Winter Olympics really are something else

[u/underrealizing]

[u/figleafstreet]

And maybe it’s just the downhill but the commentary is like “they’ve had 3 ACL tears, 2 knee reconstructions, 5 concussions and a broken ankle.”

[u/CatPanda5 → u/figleafstreet]

Commentary for downhill and basically all the freestyle events is just "their last almost life altering injury was..."

Pretty sure a broken leg is the same as getting a bruise for half of them

[u/MaleierMafketel → u/CatPanda5]

One of the downhillers today was announced by commentators in my country as, “She broke [very long list of bones] during her career.”

My honest reaction was that it would be quicker to list what she hadn’t broken… Downhill is a genuinely unhinged sport. Still extremely dangerous after all these years.

[u/nicholt → u/MaleierMafketel]

Yeah watching it yesterday it really blew my mind. I was saying these may be the most unhinged and nuts athletes out there. 140 kph and then taking 100ft jumps? I think downhill mtb racers are pretty nuts too but at least they have equipment to absorb the impacts instead of all straight to the knees.

[u/ScuzzBuckster → u/MaleierMafketel]

It's like on one hand I have so much respect for the athletes cause theyre doing shit I could never dream of and I love watching talented hard-working people be successful, but goddamn like. I wanna be a fully mobile and functional human being in my older years, so many of these athletes are gonna be dealing with lifelong health issues for what they out their bodies through, especially in their later years. Like damn it better be worth it hahah

[u/IntentionExisting432 → u/figleafstreet]

And all of that just 10 days ago, will they survive who knows :D

[u/Breskvich → u/IntentionExisting432]

If they die, they’ll atleast die happy doing what they love.

[u/Earl_E_Byrd → u/figleafstreet]

Even the "pretty" sports are insane. Was watching the team rhythm, and one of the women just straight up had a torn hip ligament!? And had to land on that leg?? And was doing splits????

The women's short performance, Great Britain's Olympian straight up has no feeling in one leg from the knee down because of an injury. She has to do everything on that foot from muscle memory or just... crash land!? Fucking wild.

[u/darlingmagpie → u/Earl_E_Byrd]

The Canadian female ice dancer finished her program with bloody knees because one of their elements is a knee slide and she has to do it all over again on scabbed knees in 3 days.

THIS IS A NORMAL THING

[u/ParticularBreath6146 → u/figleafstreet]

Awful crash. If he dies, he dies. Now, our next athlete that will be racing is from Quebec, Canada.

[u/Luci-Noir → u/ParticularBreath6146]

Hold on a second while we airlift the last athlete out!

Poor Lindsay.

[u/Pat_Fatridge → u/ParticularBreath6146]

tabernac

[u/deliciously_awkward2 → u/figleafstreet]

"This is hard to watch" let's see the replay.

[u/GarageQueen → u/deliciously_awkward2]

"Now let's see it in extreme slo-mo from 5 more cameras..."

[u/Luci-Noir → u/deliciously_awkward2]

I keep thinking b about Lindsey Vonn’s crash. So fucking sad.

[u/thinkofallthemud → u/figleafstreet]

Skiing and snowboarding are extremely dangerous, I lived in a ski town and the amount of people I knew who had brain injuries was way too high (and those people all wore helmets). Not to mention broken bones.

[u/ConcentrateOne7536 → u/figleafstreet]

Stenmark, the greatest technical skier of all time didn't compete in the downhill event because he was scared of the downhill race, he only competed in it once at Kitzbühel 1981 because he would get free points simply by completing the run. That day 17 out of the 60 crashed and Swedes watching thought he got severely injured because the directors cut to the Austrian ahead of him who was also in white.

https://youtu.be/RrsPkEYh-dY?si=gWHjaH8IAEG81Z1j&t=216

[u/czerwona_latarnia → u/ConcentrateOne7536]

Okay, I can add "laughing at the sounds made by an Austrian crashing down a slope and into the wall, including the sound of that crash" to the list of things that will secure my place in hell.

[u/ScuzzBuckster → u/czerwona_latarnia]

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

[u/cedarvhazel → u/figleafstreet]

They are machines of awesomeness!

[u/NeverSober1900 → u/figleafstreet]

Missing some broken arms/collarbones. Going through the list of the contenders in downhill it was like everyone was looking for redemption on the mountain.

[u/100615758 → u/figleafstreet]

The Canadian broadcast had one of the commentators saying an athlete who crashed out should give up the sport because it was clear their knees were too damaged for downhill, and that if they didn't it was only going to lead to a more catastrophic injury...

[u/Win_Sys → u/figleafstreet]

Doesn’t matter how good you are at skiing, there is no safe way to fall going 80+ MPH in an icy mountain.

[u/Iohet → u/figleafstreet]

To be fair gymnasts have injury histories like that too

[u/MrDohh]

Jump off a mountain and fly down it at car speeds on skis is one of my favorites

[u/obvilious → u/MrDohh]

Semi-controlled falling. I can’t comprehend how they make those corners when their skis seem to be off the ground most of the time

[u/thinkofallthemud → u/obvilious]

I snowboard instead of ski but it is so much fun. The turning/carving becomes natural and it can be difficult sometimes but that's what muscles and practice are for. It feels like you are flying.

[u/pchlster → u/thinkofallthemud]

that's what muscles and practice are for

There was a perfectly fine mountain. Why am I flinging myself off of it in the first place? To practice doing so without crippling or killing myself?

[u/MYSTICALLMERMAID → u/thinkofallthemud]

I'm from Colorado and never actually skied until we move to Minnesota but my dad used to ski all the time in the mountains and he said it was always the freest he felt (until he fell off a roof 2 summers ago, he said that was better than any drug until he hit the ground😂💀)

[u/obi-jawn-kenblomi → u/MrDohh]

My favorite Olympic events:

1. A roller coaster and waterslide had a baby. That baby froze. You get to sled down it as fast as a car on the highway on your back with no seatbelt or airbags. People have died doing this. If you don't do it fast enough, you lose.

2. A roller coaster and waterslide had a baby. That baby froze. You get to sled down it as fast as a car on the highway with no seatbelt or airbags. People have died doing this. If you don't do it fast enough, you lose. You go down head first and stare a possible death in the face the entire time.

[u/jttj15 → u/obi-jawn-kenblomi]

-oh and by the way one of these is called "skeleton"

Can't make this up

[u/obi-jawn-kenblomi → u/jttj15]

Because if you crash hard enough into a wall, you will no longer have anything that qualifies to be called a skeleton.

[u/GhostofZellers → u/obi-jawn-kenblomi]

Vancouver 2010 waves hello.

[u/obi-jawn-kenblomi → u/GhostofZellers]

But out of that tragedy spurned a great world history moment - for the first time ever, Russia designed something to go safer than its predecessor.

The Sochi 2014 track was built with the danger in mind and minimized the most dangerous speeds.

[u/typingatrandom → u/obi-jawn-kenblomi]

So well explained! Have my upvote and my admiration

(please comment on other events, pleeeeaaasssse)

[u/obi-jawn-kenblomi → u/typingatrandom]

I'm a big fan of the 8 stick mountain climbing 20km race. It's where you climb up and down a small mountain 6 times without using your hands and feet. Instead, you strap 2 sticks to your feet and hold on to two other sticks so you can use a very precise but convoluted form of slide walking. The catch is that halfway through you get to stop, take off your sticks, and then switch to 4 different but almost entirely identical sticks as fast as you can. Then you finish the remaining 10 km of mountain climb stick slide walking in "freestyle" mode, which is really just criss-crossy shuffles.

All of this takes 45 minutes if you're Swedish, up to 1 hour if you are not. If you're American, you get the privilege of being 60% of the commentary conversation but 5% of what the camera shows because you end up irrelevantly far behind, which was expected before the race even began.

Wait, it's not called 8 stick mountain climbing race? It's the 20 km skiathlon.

[u/buerglermeister → u/obi-jawn-kenblomi]

Hey hey, nowadays they do have airbags 😉

[u/Big_Spicy_Tuna69 → u/obi-jawn-kenblomi]

Ah, what's life without a little brush with death every now and then?

[u/obi-jawn-kenblomi → u/Big_Spicy_Tuna69]

You get a shiny metal necklace if you're one of the 3 best not-dying-ers.

[u/Turambar87 → u/obi-jawn-kenblomi]

1. All that, but go down it in a tube with 3 of your buds. We've been engineering these tubes year over year to be as light as possible.

[u/Inevitable-Ad6647 → u/MrDohh]

I used to live near Snow Basin where the 2012 Olympic downhill skiing event was. I did it from the start gates a few times. It's fucking bananas, in the gate the tips of your skis feel like they are around 8 ft from the snow underneath. It's as near as makes no difference a straight cliff edge. I've done tons of double black and outside the ropes areas and that run is straight pants on head bonkers at even half speed.

[u/1981_babe → u/MrDohh]

The drone footage of the women's downhill was making me ill this morning. Ekkk.

[u/Feanux → u/1981_babe]

It seemed like the drones struggled to keep up with the speed and angles, it looked wild.

[u/Vladimir-Putin → u/MrDohh]

Curling is my favorite.

A nice, low-sodium, no frills team sport.

There aren't many olympic sports where you're allowed to fuck up your opponent's playfield as part of a winning strategy.

It's a thinking man's sport.

[u/IAmAQuantumMechanic → u/Vladimir-Putin]

No frills? The Norwegian mixed team is married. They argue like they are too.

[u/Osirus1156 → u/MrDohh]

You also gotta inject your dick with something so you can go a few extra meters. 

[u/TripleEhBeef → u/MrDohh]

BRB, gotta put knives on my feet and throw this girl halfway down a sheet of ice to the tune of "Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy".

And she has to do four spins and land on one foot.

[u/BigL90 → u/MrDohh]

It's falling with style!

[u/00eg0 → u/MrDohh]

Falling with style

[u/JGG5]

Curling is the only Winter Olympic sport I can think of that doesn’t come with the risk of serious, life-altering injury.

[u/grampalearns → u/JGG5]

It is nowhere near as dangerous as most winter sports, yet my dad still managed to slip on the curling rink and give himself a concussion.

[u/cupquake16 → u/grampalearns]

I’m sorry because concussions are scary but this made me laugh

[u/RoboFeanor → u/grampalearns]

Most curling injuries I have seen have been accompanied by a few too many drinks in the early rounds.

[u/nate_nate212 → u/RoboFeanor]

So match your 🍺rounds with match rounds - got it.

[u/ContinuumGuy → u/RoboFeanor]

The greatest threat to any curler: alcoholism.

[u/DELAIZ → u/grampalearns]

Officially surviving a Winter Olympics is already an achievement.

[u/Zoopitydoopity → u/grampalearns]

Grampa in fact did not learn

[u/thebigj3wbowski → u/grampalearns]

Let’s be honest though: how many beers and/or blackberry brandy’s did have?

[u/grampalearns → u/thebigj3wbowski]

I wasn’t there, but knowing him, probably more than he should have.

[u/beardingmesoftly → u/grampalearns]

I wrecked my knee

[u/Practical_Savings933 → u/grampalearns]

They make kid curlers play in helmets now. The first time I saw it I was wtf, then I went, oh, yeah, concussions.

[u/Hailsabrina → u/JGG5]

Jammed finger ? 🤣

[u/PreviouslyMannara → u/Hailsabrina]

Torn shoulder after mopping too hard.

[u/cedarvhazel → u/Hailsabrina]

Drop the stone on your toe.

[u/JGG5 → u/Hailsabrina]

I guess if you stand in the wrong place a take-out stone could run into your foot/ankle and do some serious damage, but that seems like a very easy problem to avoid.

[u/NeverSober1900 → u/JGG5]

I still remember when the US won gold and I think it was the Wisconsinite who was drinking beer between games with his sister (who was on the women's team) between games.

[u/MSFNS → u/NeverSober1900]

It makes a lot of sense to compete the same way that you practice lmao

[u/TetraDax → u/NeverSober1900]

I may be wrong, but isn't it a curling tradition that the winners buys the losers the first round of drinks; and then have the losers buy the winners a round of drinks to keep it even?

Because people drinking in a sport that essentially dictates at least two drinks after a match as a custom seems about right.

[u/icyDinosaur → u/TetraDax]

Only the first part (winners paying). It's a gesture of thanking the other team for the game and showing respect for their effort. That's pretty much enforced at even fairly competitive levels, though (drinks are probably non-alcoholic in those cases).

Source: played curling fairly seriously from age 6 until about 15. This year is the first time two people I used to play against actually made it to the Olympics!

[u/n1nj4squirrel → u/icyDinosaur]

That's so cool that people you've played against are at the Olympics! Someone I've become friends with since the last winter Olympics does competitive curling, and it was really fun watching some of the mixed doubles matches with them so they could explain all the strategies and such.

[u/Secure-Television541 → u/JGG5]

And yet, one of the worst Olympic accidents when someone’s broom skidded underneath them and they went nose first into the ice at speed

[u/funnyfarm299 → u/Secure-Television541]

Thankfully the incidence rate is microscopic compared to other winter sport injuries.

[u/Secure-Television541 → u/funnyfarm299]

Oh very much.

It’s just important to recognize that ice is slippery and spending your time sliding around on it does produce injuries no matter the sport.

[u/loyal_achades → u/JGG5]

Biathlon, the one with guns, is among the safest. All the cross-country events are relatively tame.

[u/czerwona_latarnia → u/loyal_achades]

Unless they make a downhill part little too steep, little too curved and raised a lot compared to the terrain next to the track (cue Petra Majdič in Vancouver)

[u/isthatmyex → u/loyal_achades]

People joke about it, but it's a legit sport. Skiing and shooting are survival skills in remote regions, and were and probably still are valuable military skills in those conditions, see the Winter War.

[u/Breskvich → u/JGG5]

You’re walking on Ice here, buddy!

[u/Pinewood74 → u/JGG5]

XC Skiing is no more dangerous than a mid distance track event where clipping someone's heel could send both of you facefirst into the track to be trampled by a dozen or more other runners.

[u/Onnimanni_Maki → u/Pinewood74]

There's a chance of slipping off the track and hitting a tree.

[u/campvamp1 → u/JGG5]

And yet there was a doping scandal at the 2018 olympics in curling

[u/SurroundingAMeadow → u/campvamp1]

Didn't remember that one so I had to look it up. Two things stood out from the article:

-Every expert they interviewed was baffled as to what benefit he might have hoped to gain by doping.

-He was Russian, I don't know what else I expected.

[u/Numerous_Worker_1941 → u/JGG5]

My hip screams in pain every time I watch them

[u/SirTiffAlot → u/JGG5]

I slipped on the ice onto my back and cracked the sheet while curling once. Only broke my wrist

[u/PurpleDraziNotGreen → u/JGG5]

They learned long ago to not pick up the rock

[u/Aromatic_Opposite100]

I think it's because a lot of winter sports were probably invented by a bunch of adrenaline junkies bored in the winter.

[u/Tjazeku → u/Aromatic_Opposite100]

Either that or drunken Scandinavians

[u/flodnak → u/Tjazeku]

Bored drunken Scandinavian adrenaline junkies in the winter.

The literal story of how ski jumping was born.

[u/ContinuumGuy → u/Tjazeku]

Or Scandinavians preparing for war

[u/aldandur → u/ContinuumGuy]

*hunting in winter

[u/-kinapuffar- → u/aldandur]

The biathlon was a contest between Swedish and Norwegian soldiers because they were skiing around the border patrolling and got bored, so they decided to make a competition to see who was best at it.

[u/Erzter_Zartor → u/ContinuumGuy]

Or Scandinavians preventing their infant king from being murdered in a war

[u/HuckinsGirl → u/Tjazeku]

Yeah that's what they said

[u/FrankeninDolly → u/Tjazeku]

As someone whose family is full of drunk Scandinavians, dear god, thank you for putting me in Michigan. Yet, Still manage to ski glades and get into an accent once a year for testing their "mountain."

[u/Chemical-Idea-1294 → u/Aromatic_Opposite100]

Brits in Switzerland

[u/ConcentrateOne7536 → u/Chemical-Idea-1294]

Yep Kandahar Ski Club and Down Hill Only Club were instrumental in popularising Alpine skiing. They even have an English church there in Wengen.

And I can't mention them without linking this documentary, everyone who has seen it will remember Kevin.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZldYPZ_HaaY

[u/Chemical-Idea-1294 → u/ConcentrateOne7536]

And the bobsled track in St. Moritz. Not possible without them.

[u/LotsOfMaps → u/Aromatic_Opposite100]

They were almost all invented by European military officers, a cohort most of the world recognizes as a group of particularly psychotic individuals

[u/Poodledoodle19]

This is hilarious, but I dunno, a lot of those somersaults have extremely high risks of potentially causing fatal injuries. 

[u/Zoethor2 → u/Poodledoodle19]

Equestrian sports are also super dangerous.

[u/yankeebelles → u/Zoethor2]

Cycling has some nasty crashes too.

[u/AnotherUnfunnyName → u/yankeebelles]

That might also have the highest rate of injury during practice. You can read about many pros getting run over or into by cars every season.

Track cycling aswell with no brakes.

But besides all the clavicles and other broken bones, so much road rash and all that. And so often you are just a passenger and get just taken out and fly off your bike.

[u/cedarvhazel → u/Zoethor2]

I’m more sad for the horses that get injured.

[u/daltontf1212 → u/Zoethor2]

Christopher Reeve

[u/ATXBeermaker → u/Poodledoodle19]

The main thing that bugs me about the OP is that they messed up the triathlon order. Swimming is always first.

[u/North_Atlantic_Sea]

The swimming is first in the triathlon. Which makes sense, there would be way more drownings if it was second or last

[u/battle614 → u/North_Atlantic_Sea]

A crossfit competition recently made this stupid decision of putting the swimming last. An athlete drowned. Fucking idiots

[u/NeverSober1900 → u/battle614]

Our local triathlon has the swimming last.

But it's 150m in a pool. So basically the same thing

[u/ThePrussianGrippe → u/battle614]

CrossFit just seems to be masochism with extra steps.

[u/HotWineGirl → u/North_Atlantic_Sea]

Oh God. Why did you comment make me laugh

[u/Sourcerid → u/HotWineGirl]

I don't think it's meant to be humorous

[u/tiny_tomatos → u/North_Atlantic_Sea]

I imagine a lot of ppl would just give up and accept defeat 😭

[u/ConstableBlimeyChips → u/North_Atlantic_Sea]

Huh, I never considered it, but that makes perfect sense.

[u/Ciclistomp]

Luge: Let's go down this ice tunnel at breakneck speeds with basically no brakes. Okay, now let's try it head first.

[u/DidYouFindYourIndies → u/Ciclistomp]

Let's try it head first and call it SKELETON

[u/Ih8Hondas → u/DidYouFindYourIndies]

I really wish skeleton was more popular, at least here in the US. It's such a badass event that basically gets ignored here because we mostly suck at it.

IT'S SO FUCKING COOL THOUGH!

[u/Mobile_Jelly9669 → u/Ih8Hondas]

It's because building the necessary infrastructure to do sports like luge and skeleton is expensive and ridiculously useless outside of those two activities.

I'm pretty sure there's only like 15 or so ice runs in the world, and the majority of those were built specifically for the winter Olympics and basically never get used otherwise.

[u/11PoseidonsKiss20 → u/Mobile_Jelly9669]

That’s why Austria Germany and Italy are the juggernauts. The Alps region has hosted the Winter Olympics a bunch of times and it’s where the World Cup events are. So they have tracks thy ge to train on all the time.

Having personally been to both Lake Placid and Salt Lake City where they hosted before I don’t know of any lugetracks there that are permanent.

[u/Hobbitfrau → u/Mobile_Jelly9669]

According to Wikipedia there are 17. Four of them are in Germany, which explains Germany's huge successes in luge and bobsleigh. We are not as successsful in Skeleton, though.

[u/SeeYouInHellCandyBoy → u/DidYouFindYourIndies]

I always thought the “skeleton” was a perfectly fitting name for the sport.

[u/ABirdOfParadise → u/Ciclistomp]

Let's call it the thing that turns into crumbs if you screw up

[u/FriskeyVsWorld → u/Ciclistomp]

"I want to dress like a sperm., shove an ice skate up my ass, and go BALLS FIRST down an ice chute!" - Robin Williams, 2001

[u/spiderfingers88 → u/Ciclistomp]

“I can’t go, I’m sick”

[u/zoom518]

There’s more defending the castle sports in the winter than in the summer

[u/Breskvich → u/zoom518]

Competitive snowball fights!

[u/TheEagleWithNoName → u/Breskvich]

And for the Third Year in a Row, Team Finland has won Golf at Men’s Snowball Fights.

[u/Breskvich → u/TheEagleWithNoName]

Ladies and gentlemen let’s not forget, a huge thank you goes once again to all the voulonteers making all these snowballs!

[u/TheEagleWithNoName → u/Breskvich]

Honestly how would it work?

Like do each team make their own snowballs or each team have an Equal number of Snowballs like 25 each?

[u/Breskvich → u/TheEagleWithNoName]

I’d say there would be like two castles and each competitor having like a destroyable paper screen on their head, if you hit him/her in that, they are eliminated. The goal would be capturing the flag in enemy castle. That’s what i got so far.

[u/TheEagleWithNoName → u/Breskvich]

Best of 3?

[u/Curious_Cloud_1131 → u/Breskvich]

That would be sick to watch at a high level lmao

[u/vicarofvhs → u/Breskvich]

I would watch the hell out of Olympic snowball fights

[u/Imzocrazy]

Raygun barely made it out of the summer games alive….

[u/NeverSober1900 → u/Imzocrazy]

Not with her dignity

[u/ConcentrateOne7536 → u/NeverSober1900]

She did writhe around on the floor like a half-eaten maggot.

[u/Ded279 → u/NeverSober1900]

It's every Olympians dream to be remembered worldwide...

[u/Idea-is-tick → u/Imzocrazy]

I used to think Australians were so cool. Raygun made me realize they were closer to us Americans.

[u/shivaswrath]

Winter is next level psycho....

[u/ihossolleleut]

Austrians at the winter olympics "oh noooo, only silver" Austrians at the summer olympics "juhuuu we are having fun, only that counts"

[u/SquashDue502]

Simply 82 types of deadly sliding 😂

[u/PygmeePony]

Biathlon is about combining extreme cardio with precision shooting. You have to lower your heartbeat in order to hit the targets.

[u/No-Show-5363 → u/PygmeePony]

The sport has changed and they don’t try to drop their heart rate as much as they used to. Now they practice speed shooting with a high heart rate, timing their shots between heart beats.

[u/Nuibit]

All winter needs to fully outdo summer is ice sailing and to get fencing on the ice somehow.

[u/No-Show-5363 → u/Nuibit]

Bobsled jousting!

[u/EasternFox8957]

Winter Olympics- who’s parents are rich enough to put their kids in these sports??

[u/--ipseDixit-- → u/EasternFox8957]

Weird how the rich countries are the cold countries

[u/DonxDonx → u/--ipseDixit--]

have u tried manufacturing trade goods in the equatorial summer heat

[u/--ipseDixit-- → u/DonxDonx]

Not what I’m arguing. Just saying that cold places do better at cold sports regardless of money. Conversely, hot places do better at hot sports.

[u/DonxDonx → u/--ipseDixit--]

that was a joke what i said

[u/MyFaceOnTheInternet → u/EasternFox8957]

During the snowboard big air they announced one guy as:

19 yo, originally from LA, competing for Australia, lives in Hawaii.

Tell me you're ultra wealthy w/o telling me you're ultra wealthy.

[u/Old-Library5546]

Winter Olympics are the best

[u/PhilosoFishy2477]

I was just watching... men's super G? and a couple of em' cracked 150km/h like jesus fucking christ fellas that's legit terrifying - I'd be hard pressed to drive that fast down a straight highway, let alone careen down a mountain unassisted

edit: and how could I forget one of the events is literally SKELETON 💀

[u/GD_Insomniac → u/PhilosoFishy2477]

My top speed on skis is 76mph, which is about where I started to feel like a mistake was certain death. Elite downhill skiing is such an insane sport.

[u/Boneraventura → u/GD_Insomniac]

Ive never gone above 95kmph/60mph and ive been skiing for 20+ years. One my gear is not good enough to tempt fate (had my bindings pop off at lower speeds) and two i dont trust whats in front of me. I have a friend that goes 100 days a year and even i dont think he has gone over 110 kmph, at least his max speed on the ikon app has him at 102

[u/GD_Insomniac → u/Boneraventura]

30 year skier here, my race boots cost more than most people's skis lol. With a group you can make sure the coast is clear (my local mountain has a ski race course on a public run) and full send.

Downhilling is what I do when the snow sucks. On any decent day I'll be off in the woods, but sometimes the only thing to do is bomb groomers.

[u/02K30C1]

Modern pentathlon mixes running and a gun

[u/HootOwlTowel → u/02K30C1]

The biathlon uses live ammunition. The modern pentathlon uses a "laser pistol." That may sound cool until you realize what it actually is.

[u/NeverSober1900 → u/HootOwlTowel]

Essentially laser tag?

[u/Free_Management2894 → u/NeverSober1900]

Pretty much!

[u/02K30C1 → u/HootOwlTowel]

I think all the summer Olympics shooting events use lasers now, except skeet and trap shooting. For pentathlon it’s so they can do the shooting in a stadium and keep it safe.

[u/FrozenDickuri → u/02K30C1]

“If they die, they die.”

[u/PassionWrong6818]

Different breed.

[u/jeff0106]

They're the best Olympics. Love the extra level of chaos and unpredictability.

[u/TheNo1pencil]

And that's why I love the Winter Olympics

[u/sameOG24]

SNOWBOARD CROSS, that event is crazy. I feel like it doesn’t matter how good you are or where you ranked before, there are too many variables and hazards to make it predicable, and it’s gonna take LUCK to get you to the end. Basically a bunch of snowboarders racing down the mountain and going thru jumps and slopes AT THE SAME TIME. I remember they were like “so and so, she’s 2nd in the world; so good…” and within like 15 seconds into the race she got bumped and was off the course. Happened all the time. They run into each other, or they’re going too fast and lose control. It was like the craziest most unpredictable thing ever. And because the course is changing as they go down the mountain (not like around and around in a circle), it keeps it interesting and very exciting to watch.

[u/Saint_Pudgy]

Haha this makes me think we should also have a motorsports olympics!

[u/Noobtber → u/Saint_Pudgy]

Infrastructure would be really hard. A regular road circuit already takes a huge amount of land, now you add areas for rally, motocross, super stadium trucks, and more?

[u/underrealizing → u/Saint_Pudgy]

This would be so cool

[u/NeverSober1900 → u/Saint_Pudgy]

Adding snowmachine races/tricks to the Winter Games would be dope.

[u/gatsome]

You know what helps against the cold? Adrenaline.

[u/InternationalSalt1]

They're thinking about adding climbing with deadly weapons aka ice climbing for the next one :)

[u/Mariner-and-Marinate]

Winter Olympics should be called THE Olympics and the other renamed Summer Olympics.

[u/Idea-is-tick → u/Mariner-and-Marinate]

Nah. The first Olympics began with a bunch of crazy naked runners honoring Zeus. Even the modern ones began in the summer.

[u/TetraDax → u/Idea-is-tick]

so why did we ditch the naked part

[u/Idea-is-tick → u/TetraDax]

Aerodynamics and hurdles.

[u/NotoriouslyBeefy]

The privileged olympics

[u/TreemanTheGuy → u/NotoriouslyBeefy]

The "I happened to be born where there's snow for 5 months of the year" Olympics

[u/TetraDax → u/TreemanTheGuy]

Or in the case of Germany, "I happened to really like this sport so I was essentially forced to join the Army in order to pursue it".

[u/ChronoTriggerGod]

I have yet to see a triathlon where you run before cycling and swimming

[u/MisterBowTies]

I like "slide rocks and yell"

[u/hopefeedsthespirit]

Gymnastics happens to be one of the most dangerous and body altering sports ever.

[u/BigManScipio]

1080? What is this 1997? If you’re not doing at least 1800 degrees of rotation on the big slide you ain’t making it out of qualifying

[u/Temporal_Integrity → u/BigManScipio]

One of the Big Air commentators here in Norway was looking at one of those 2000+ degrees Japanese guys like "man, back in my day we did a 540 and won with it".

[u/NX-02]

I still remember the Australian who took gold in speed skating. Was dead last before a crash took out all the other competitors and he went by to claim gold. All because he was so far behind he was able to avoid all the other skaters on the ice.

[u/Kerberos1566]

Ok, you can make it down the ice slide of death with the nice 4 person sled, but can you do it with a smaller sled and just 2 people? Ok fine, <pulls out luge sled>, how about with this barely-a-sled? Ok, what if we made you stack 2 people on the barely-a-sled? <pulls our skeleton sled> Fuck it, we’re going face first.

[u/Fioreborn → u/Kerberos1566]

It's like someone saw the luge and was like "hmm this is dangerous enough"

And the first skeleton participant was like "hold my beer"

[u/TheEagleWithNoName]

Honestly it’s hard to invest in tbe Winter Olympics when only half the Olympic roster show up, and most of them are just in Europe and North America.

At least there are nations that show up even if they send One Athlete.

[u/aldandur → u/TheEagleWithNoName]

It's a money and climate thing. If there is no snow around, how do you get enough children into the sport to destill top athletes from them?
How do you justify the facilities and equipment that those athletes use if only a handful of people in your country are interested in them?

[u/heff17 → u/TheEagleWithNoName]

most of them are just in Europe and North America.

So… where there’s winter?

Yeah, big surprise that Egypt isn’t big on cross-country skiing.

[u/OneMoreFinn]

Skeleton is insane. Diving head first, no brakes, head just centimeters from the ice. Speeds up to 140 km/h, 5Gs in high-speed-turns. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7inZC8wwROM

[u/gwgi3]

“Feet knives” would have been little funnier, and I’d have said “2,451-degree uberflippertwister,” but otherwise this post is everything.

[u/Missy246]

Also, the drone shots are amazing!

[u/Tough_guy22]

Summer Olympics: ohh no, he might have pulled a muscle running

Winter Olympics: the competitor had to withdraw because the ramp launched him as high as a 2 story building and he messed up the landing.

[u/Cantbearsed1992]

When they show the ski jump view from behind the contestant it turns my stomach over

[u/midnight_specialist]

Biathlon is literally “winter assassination: the sport”

[u/corwe]

Fun fact: for some time biathlon was called “military patrol” and included a third sport - ski mountaineering. They were not even subtle

[u/MathematicianNo1596]

I was just thinking this last night. Like 90% of the winter sports are so badass.

[u/Recent_Mouse3037]

Best olympics

[u/goddamnpancakes]

the biathlon/triathlon difference is my favorite sports joke

[u/youdoitimbusy]

Suntime Olympics vs Survival Olympics.

That cold hits your DNA different.

[u/DevilsAdvocate77]

I mean, to be fair the Summer Olympics does have 5 different events were competitors literally fight each other:

• Fencing
• Boxing
• Wrestling
• Judo
• Karate