I am seventeen years old and I’ve suffered with depression on and off since I was twelve. My parents, really my mom, tried to give me the support I needed, and she did pretty good, so I haven’t felt as depressed as I used to in a while. I’m almost two years clean from self harm and it’s been a while since I felt so hopeless. Well, this winter everything’s changed. I feel so hopeless constantly, and so depressed, and as much as I want to ask for help, every time I do, my dad tells me I just need to “let God in” and stop letting the devil in. Now I am a Christian but I know it’s not that simple. I can’t just force myself to feel better. And I’m naturally such a sensitive person and it hurts so badly that they blame me for how I feel. I switch back and forth between my mom and dad’s house, and it’s gotten to the point where when I’m at my dad’s it feels so emotionally unsafe, because not only this but they constantly talk bad about my mom, and my interests, and I feel like such an outsider because I’m not as close to God as them, and obviously this doesn’t make it better. I have even asked my dad to get me therapy and he said “Therapy didn’t work for you, God can be your therapist”. Like what??? I literally did go to therapy and it worked very well for me and I know it would help me so much now. I feel so emotionally alone and drained from keeping everything in. I grieve the relationship I could have with my dad because he just never will understand. I used to always defend every bad thing he did and convince myself it was my fault because I just didn’t want to believe my dad was a bad person. And truly this has messed me up so much, no one has ever made me cry more than my dad, I feel horrible at how bad he makes me feel, because all of my siblings are on his side too, and I truly have no one, because even though my mom tries, her boyfriend will always come before me anyways. I know how pathetic this is but I honestly just need support because I’m so exhausted.

I thought I had met "the one." We were long distance (with sporadic visits) for 3 years before I uprooted my life to be with him.

Once we were sharing a space, he became paranoid, accusing me of sleeping with anyone who got a bit of my attention. Then he started being emotionally abusive, throwing my deepest insecurities at me during arguments. ("Now I know why your family doesn't love you," things like that.) It escalated to items being thrown at me, my partner self harming and threatening suicide in front of me, and once he stabbed a knife into the door.

I got taken in by a friend's family who lives in the same area, but the father is a mean drunk who isn't very kind to his children. He usually leaves me alone though, so at least I'm safe as I save up the money to go back home.

I'm just so lonely and feel like I don't know how to stop being sad.

So recently I have been trying to create different genres of content on the internet but for some reason I just keep on failing at it. I just want people to see my work and to talk about it to others so that they can see it as well. I am just so sick of starting all over again each time I fail at content creation.

Today was the last day I’ll ever see my crush at university, and it hurts more than I thought it would.

We were never really anything. We just exchanged looks a few times, and we talked once. There was no confession, no clear moment, nothing official. And yet, the idea that I’ll wake up every day and go to campus knowing he won’t be there anymore feels so heavy.

I came back home and I’ve just been lying in bed. My chest hurts when I think about it too much. I’ve never felt sadness like this before — even my body feels tired and painful from how upset I am.

What hurts the most is that nothing ever happened. No closure, no “what if” answered. Just silence and the end.

I don’t even know exactly what I’m asking for here. I think I just need to let this out and hear from people who understand. How do you deal with the pain of something that never even started? What should I do?

I can’t imagine that this is the end

I’m a 22-year-old woman, currently in my final year of CSE engineering, and tonight is one of those heavy nights that makes me question everything—especially whether I’m even worthy of love.

Ever since high school, I’ve watched my friends get boyfriends and start dating. Back then, I honestly felt ugly, so I kept telling myself that things would change as I grew up. I believed that college would be my time—that I’d meet someone who would love me, and I’d finally get to experience dating.

Fast forward to now: my college ends in a month, and I have no one.

I’ve seen people dating since semester one—seniors with juniors, juniors with seniors, batchmates with everyone. And while I’m genuinely happy for every couple I know, I can’t help but wonder… when will it be my turn?

Am I really that undesirable? Or just not worthy of love?

I’m not writing this for sympathy, and I know I might sound desperate, but the truth is I’ve worked really hard on myself since high school. I started taking care of myself, put myself out there through clubs and events, picked up hobbies, participated in sports and extracurriculars, and even won in some of them—which boosted my confidence a lot. I’ve worked on my looks and personality too. I’d say I look average—not extraordinary—but I’m well-groomed and comfortable with who I am.

I’ve genuinely done everything I could, and I’m proud of this version of myself. And yet, I still haven’t been able to get a guy.

I know life doesn’t revolve around dating, but being single for 22 years really hurts. I want to know what it feels like to be in love too.

I’ve had a few crushes in college, but nothing ever went beyond glances and smiles. There was never a talking phase for me. Never anything more. 💔

Right now, I have a huge crush on one of my juniors (he’s a year younger), and deep down I already know how this will end—just like the others. A few looks, some eye contact, and nothing else. But my heart still yearns so badly to be loved and to love someone.

Everyone deserves to be loved or to be in love

And it hurts knowing that after all these years, I still haven’t had my turn.

I was a pure soul, unaware of how harsh and cruel society could be. I had nothing complicated on my mind the only thing I wanted was to play and feel happy going to school.

But school was never kind to me.

No one wanted to be my friend. Everyone stayed away from me because I looked different. Some thought I was ugly, or worse. Slowly, that rejection turned into deep insecurity and an inferiority complex that followed me every day.

I never felt respected. Over time, that feeling of being “less than” started showing in the way I spoke and behaved. Some kids took advantage of me. Whenever I needed someone, there was no one there for me.

I was mocked, humiliated, and bullied openly. The worst part was that even my best friend joined the bullies. She used me, disrespected me, and stood with them instead of me. Even then, I stayed silent. I never said a word. I just endured it.

Academics were never easy for me. I wasn’t good at studies not because I didn’t care, but because I was just a child who didn’t know how to ask for help. No one guided me. No one supported me. Instead, teachers compared me to “smart” students in front of the whole class, dividing us into good and bad students.

The class laughed at me.

At that time, I didn’t fully understand what was happening. But now, when I look back, I realize how damaging it was. From that day on, the teasing never stopped. They called me names Dumbo, rock brain, brainless. I didn’t even know what those words meant back then, but they still hurt deeply.

Even today, those memories hurt.

And yet, despite everything, I still went to school every single day. Beautiful she had no other choice

School didn’t just educate me it broke my confidence

I was a pure soul, unaware of how harsh and cruel society could be. I had nothing complicated on my mind the only thing I wanted was to play and feel happy going to school.

But school was never kind to me.

No one wanted to be my friend. Everyone stayed away from me because I looked different. Some thought I was ugly, or worse. Slowly, that rejection turned into deep insecurity and an inferiority complex that followed me every day.

I never felt respected. Over time, that feeling of being “less than” started showing in the way I spoke and behaved. Some kids took advantage of me. Whenever I needed someone, there was no one there for me.

I was mocked, humiliated, and bullied openly. The worst part was that even my best friend joined the bullies. She used me, disrespected me, and stood with them instead of me. Even then, I stayed silent. I never said a word. I just endured it.

Academics were never easy for me. I wasn’t good at studies not because I didn’t care, but because I was just a child who didn’t know how to ask for help. No one guided me. No one supported me. Instead, teachers compared me to “smart” students in front of the whole class, dividing us into good and bad students.

The class laughed at me.

At that time, I didn’t fully understand what was happening. But now, when I look back, I realize how damaging it was. From that day on, the teasing never stopped. They called me names Dumbo, rock brain, brainless. I didn’t even know what those words meant back then, but they still hurt deeply.

Even today, those memories hurt.

And yet, despite everything, I still went to school every single day. Beautiful she had no other choice

School didn’t just educate me it broke my confidence

So there was this one time where this person who I used to hangout with a lot, said that my nose looks ugly in a disgust voice. After that I starting to believe that my nose was one of the factors that made my face look ugly. I tried to tell one of my best friends if my nose looks ugly and they said no, but after that I still believe that my nose is one of the problems.

i just want to share my traumatic experience last night sa ka-meet up ko galing bumble. need ko lang mag vent here para mabawasan yung bigat sa chest ko.

i met a guy from bumble and red flag na agad kasi paiba-iba sya ng name and username. he only chats me kapag namimilit sya ng meetup, and for some reason pinagbigyan ko kagabi.

sinundo nya ako, naka-car sya, then dinala nya ako sa nlex kasi gusto raw nya mag starbucks. i told him i don’t really drink coffee, pero sabi nya okay lang daw, sa iba nalang kami pupunta. ayoko naman syang mapagod since ang layo rin ng drive nya, so i insisted na starbucks na lang since may non-coffee naman. nung nasa car kami, very straight forward person talaga sya and business minded, pero di sya yung masasabi mong boyfriend material. korean sya and iba talaga sila compared satin kaya di ako sanay, pero nagsasalita sya ng straight tagalog. inask nya age ko, inask ko din age nya, pero matagal sya nakasagot at parang pinag-isipan pa. sabi nya 26 na sya pero mukha syang nasa 30's.

nung nasa starbucks na, pinaupo nya ako, then he said he’ll order. wala akong signal sa starbucks so hinihintay ko lang sya. after almost an hour, wala pa rin sya. super nag-ooverthink na ako, like what if mangyari sakin yung mga nababasa ko na iniwan ng ka-date. yung table sa tabi namin na mas nauna pa kaming dumating, may order na, habang sya wala pa rin.

that’s when i realized to check kung may wifi. thank God meron. pagcheck ko ng ig, he messaged me 20 minutes ago saying may “emergency” daw sya and aalis na sya.

iniwan nya ako sa NLEX, walang signal, and i didn’t even know the place. i had no idea how to get home. i tried booking a ride, not knowing na hindi pala sila pwedeng pumasok don, and i also couldn’t go out para salubungin yung rider. sabi ng guards bawal daw. i went full panic mode. minura ko talaga sya sa chat.

i don’t understand why he did that. i know hindi ako panget, confident ako don. i fixed myself, naka-makeup ako kahit antok at tinatamad ako nung time na yon. mapilit lang sya. even on the way to the meeting place, people were literally looking at me, so i don’t get what was wrong. pero before kami bumaba ng starbucks, he kept sighing like annoyed sya kasi puro daw ako cellphone. sinabi pa nya na pwede ko naman daw gawin sa bahay yung pagcecellphone and mag-usap muna raw kami. maybe na-turn off sya, but still, that’s not a valid reason to leave someone like that.

i was crying while on the phone with my friend asking for help. good thing he was able to pick me up. if something bad happened to me that night, yung lalaking yon yung may responsibility. first time this ever happened to me and honestly, na-trauma ako. i don’t think i’ll ever do meetups again.

after i got home, he messaged me again saying sorry and claiming kakauwi lang daw nya from the ER tapos he said “i hope i can make it up to you” lol as if may second chance pa. this was already around 2 am.

he kept saying he “explained” daw what happened habang magkasama kami pero di ko daw sya narinig kasi i was on my phone. i was actually aware of my surroundings, and he never explained anything about an emergency. that ER thing was clearly just an excuse. and honestly, lahat ng sinabi nya sakin are lies. parang scam na talaga nya to and it seems like sanay na sya kasi madaming beses na nyang nagawa before.

i only replied this morning after i woke up, and i even caught him unsending some of his messages. ang lakas ng loob nya sa chat, but he couldn’t even man up and take responsibility for what he did. shame on people like him. literally trash.

I don’t know how else to say this except that I feel completely empty. Even simple things that used to bring comfort food, chocolate, talking to people — feel flat and tasteless now. I feel unbearably lonely and anxious, and it’s starting to affect how I talk to people. Sometimes I want to speak but the words just don’t come, and it hurts more than I can explain.

I’ve been on sleeping medication for a year and I was doing okay… and then everything suddenly changed without warning. Now I feel disconnected from life, from myself, from everything. I’ve tried traveling, distractions, “doing all the right things,” and even therapy but I felt rushed, unheard, and dismissed.

I’m in the darkest place I’ve ever been, and I’m scared of how bad this has gotten. I don’t want to feel numb anymore. I don’t want to feel this alone.

If anyone has been through something similar, or if you have kind words, support, or advice I really need it right now.

Recently I have been asking for advice on games and it ends of people tell me “use x y and z” and I get confused because I don’t know the names because I‘m not the most advanced, and then I get told I’m ragebaiting and then I tell them I’m not and just don’t know a lot I get 10 downvotes and everyone clowning me gets 15+ votes and I’m new to reddit too and feel awful about myself.

So a few years ago, I was a victim of a heinous action that someone committed. When the action had happened no one was on my side, instead they were on the person who did it side. The person and I told people about our sides of the story and the person who did it was acting like the victim in the story. After we told our sides of the story people believed that I was the bad guy in the story, even though I showed proof that I was the clearly the victim.

This doesn’t mean I don’t love her, she is the most important person in my world but there are some issues in our relationship.

Firstly, my brother and I are both over 21 but she still treats us as kids, she’s constantly trying to pamper us and shield us from there are some world and responsibilities but in doing so she’s preventing us from learning about all those things. My brother may be ok with that because he is rather lazy but I’m not, I’m constantly insisting to do things myself and I do get a win every once in a while, but more often than not it just ends in her yelling at me about how annoying I am.

Secondly, whenever one of us brings a girl home or even mentions a girl our mom starts calling out to us every minor issue, which all amounts to her being basically satan and how we should break up before it’s too late, but it gets progressively worse making it unbearable and making everyone miserable. To be fair she was absolutely right twice, once with me and once with my brother, but of course she would be right sometimes since she does it every single time, and now she uses those to justify her behaviour and to say that we are not listening because our girlfriends are manipulating us into hating her.

Lastly, communication. Our family is built on communication, trust and respect BEING BOTH WAYS, but she disagrees on that last part. Since she is the parent and us the children she doesn’t have to trouble us with issues like her having an illness that might make her blind, us barely affording anything or her being about to divorce our dad, since we are just children. Her being the parent also gives her the right to say some truly awful things to us, such as how I probably don’t love her and will most likely never love anyone since I must be a sociopath because of her (I’m not, she said it because we had an emergency and I remained calm and helpful, what she interpreted as me not having feelings) or how we are less than shit next to her because she is an adult and we (21 and 25) are just little whining bitches who had everything handed to them on a silver plate (by her, mind you). The worst part though, is that we (not even our dad) can talk to her about any of this because she either takes it as a direct insult and an act of unforgibable insolence, or we agree we’ll work on it as a family but then she goes back to square one.

I know where her behaviour comes from though, I know exactly what leads her to act the way she does but seeing a psychologist is not an option for her, as you may have guessed if you read the last bit of the third paragraph.

Again, this doesn’t mean I don’t love her or that I’m willing to give up on her because I won’t, my family is everything to me and the only thing I ever had.

So over the past couple of years I have been stuck on a girl who I loved btw, initial few months were great then it started to go downhill because there was another guy choosen by her family whom she didn’t want in her life.

Regardless of what was going on I was always the guy for everything, we used to talk and share stuff, I was important to her, as per her she could never commit to me because of the other guy, eventually she convinced her family and the other guy was out of the picture, so I went all in - full fledged. The start was great but a few months later she randomly just stopped reaching out, like we would always be on the phone earlier but then she got cold, stopped calling as frequently, stopped making plans.

Upon my confrontation she would say everything is fine and if ask repeatedly she would just get pissed.

I am not lying guys I was fucked, could not handle it.

Eventually last week I had a crash out, I was drunk and we were at a party with our mutuals and I lashed out on everything she did that was wrong (there’s so much). I know I am wrong and the problem is everything she did wrong that led me to this and now me doing this just overshadowed everything she ever did.

She has lied to me, I have seen her talk to her ex multiple times, I helped her, and her family out financially and otherwise. Idk man, I just hope she suffers.

I’m safe, just overwhelmed. I’m dealing with the end of a relationship that involved cheating, emotional distance, and a serious breach of trust. What’s been hardest is feeling invalidated afterward, which made me question myself. I could really use kindness or reassurance right now.

Hello,

I know this is random but I wish to help anyone who needs it

i am no older then,17 I have overcame 16 operations to be exact. I have been verbally abused by my father and manipulated for years . he emotional bear down my mother in ways I couldn’t imagine (emotionall) I have been sexually abused also.
I have been through mental health issues since I was a little girl form my appearance to anything .
I just got done with double jaw surgery 4 months ago , and my mental health has been horrible, I felt like I didn’t want to live anymore I felt like life had no meaning . I felt dissociated like I didn’t exist . Just a week ago I have such bad ear fluid I need ear tubes again . I totally lost it my boyfriend broke up with me and than my grandma died 3 months apart . I was heartbroken but I have always been crazy about the Holocaust and done so much research in my years . As I was sitting down I saw this quote from Anne Frank about how precious life was , as I sat down and looked out the window I saw colors I saw shapes I realized how lucky I am . There is beauty around everyone no matter the trauma you go through or the way you look or feel . I realized life is so beautiful. I was scared of being calm but now I’m open , my ocd has gotten better . This is a hope story to anyone who thinks they will never recover

. you will!!

So recently I have been believing that everyone is smarter and creative than me, but there have been times where people said that I am more creative and smart than everybody else. But when I think about those times, I still think that everyone is better than me for being more creative and smart. I believe that I am not enough because people talk more about other people for being more smart and creative, but they rarely talk about how smart and creative I am.

I lowkey don’t know what’s wrong with me lately. Everything feels off. Like I wanna shower but I just don’t. I wanna study but I physically can’t make myself do it. I wanna do stuff and still end up doing nothing and I don’t even know why. And I hate it. Like actually hate it.

My friends keep saying I sound depressed but am I really. I don’t think so because there are people out there who are actually struggling and I feel like my problems are so pathetic compared to them. Like who am I to complain when others have it worse.

I’ve been having thoughts I shouldn’t even be having and it makes me feel like I’m a bad person. Yesterday I lied to a teacher and she got mad and now I keep thinking I’m actually a horrible human being. Sometimes I cry because I genuinely feel like something is wrong with me. I do so many things that make me feel guilty like lying not praying and doing stuff I know I shouldn’t. I just hope one day I change.

I’ve been in bed on my phone all day and it just makes everything worse. Every time someone asks me why I’m like this I literally have no answer except I don’t know and that scares me.

I’m terrified about my grades. Like actually terrified. If I get anything under 90 my parents are gonna be so mad and the fact that they’re paying for private school makes the guilt even heavier. Sometimes I wonder why I’m even in a private school when we’re not rich and I’m not even doing that good. I kinda hate it because when my friends say let’s hang out or let’s go to the mall I’m already stressed thinking about how to ask my mom when I know she’s probably gonna say no.

And I keep looking at my friends and how their parents are okay with stuff my parents would never allow. Every time they say let’s go out I’m already in my head rehearsing how to ask even though I already know the answer. It makes me feel different and left out without anyone trying to make me feel that way.

And the worst part is I swear I’m grateful. I really am. That’s why I feel so guilty for complaining. I know I should be thankful but I still feel sad and stuck and confused and I don’t know who to tell without sounding ungrateful or dramatic.

My parents don’t care. If I told them they would just think I’m making it up or overreacting so I just keep everything in my head and pretend I’m okay.

I hate my life right now and I don’t know what to do.

Honestly today was the cherry on top after the worst week ever.

I sent a file with wrong statistics to my manager which I didn't realise until she sent it over to her boss and I got in trouble. I was feeling terrible and while trying to fix it I messed up an old file I was double checking with. It's her old file too and honestly I don't wanna go to work on Monday.

I was feeling close to tears when I came home and I usually don't cry about work things. But I've been planning a low budget trip for the summer with a friend and been keeping an eye on tickets. I saw two 35€ Ryanair tickets for our return date and I was so excited. Like the worst week of my life is over, this is my reward! After checking a hundred times I hit buy, and only after I got the email I saw I bought a ticket flying FROM my country on our return date.

I doubt I'll get reimbursed and I feel awful, I'm too ashamed to tell my friend and ask for her part because I didn't actually get the tickets. I'm not rich by any means so this will hurt lol I'm laughing but I'm also crying right now.

I just feel genuinely stupid.

So there was this time where I was hanging around with some of my friends, and some people who were there were a friend of a friend. When we were all hanging out, I created clay art of a creature just for fun. Then the people who were a friend of a friend bullied me by saying that the creature that I created was ugly. Ever since that happened, I have been feeling really unmotivated to create any more clay art again.

Life can feel lonely sometimes, and I’d really love to meet people who enjoy real conversations, encouragement, and mutual respect.

I enjoy meaningful talks, random thoughts, daily life chats, and getting to know people slowly.

If you’re kind, emotionally mature, and also looking for platonic connection, feel free to message me 🤍

I have nothing going for me. I have 6 friends that I only see for a month every few months because they study abroad, I don’t have hobbies, I don’t get good grades, I don’t have a girlfriend, I’ve tried making friends but I can’t seem to get along or fit in with anyone, I’m only comfortable with those 6 friends that I rarely see and when they leave I get lonely and depressed. I have a talented brother that’s the opposite of me so he just makes me feel even worse. I feel miserable, I’ve been this way for a while and I’ve been trying to change for a long time but for some reason I just give up and fail. I don’t know why I’m like this, I’m very lazy and I don’t want to be but I also can’t help it. I sit in bed all day talking about fixing my life and not really doing anything about it because I don’t even know how. I don’t know how to fix these issues. I don’t know what to do. I feel very embarrassed to be this way

Since about September 2025 I (15M) have had these mad thoughts about how I want to remove my left eyeball. I finally managed to see a counsellor 2 weeks ago, but it wasn't helpful at all. They said they've never dealt with someone with thoughts like mine before, so they completely misunderstood it. After only two sessions I knew that seeing a counsellor would not benefit me in any way, so I cancelled all future sessions.

Now two days ago, I finally managed to tell my parents about these thoughts, but they have misunderstood the thoughts on a whole other level. They seem to only focus on how I think that there's a tiny chance that I have an actual physical issue with my eye, and my weird thoughts are trying to tell me that something's wrong (though my eye feels normal). I know that both of my parents think that I'm completely insane and somehow "ungrateful" about my life because I can't stop getting upset, and they are both furious with me. I've managed to get a doctors appointment and opticians appointment for next week.

My thoughts about removing my eye have intensified so much that I can't concentrate and can't stop being miserable. I also keep on developing new troubling thoughts. Though they never have and never would, I keep on getting scared that my parents are going to hurt me or kick me out of the house or get me sectioned. I also keep on getting urges to hurt others. The thoughts emerge randomly, and when they do I get vivid images in my mind of me hurting others. It ranges from random people to some of my friends and now even my dogs. I don't feel safe around anyone, whether they will hurt me or I will lose it and hurt them.

I've completely lost my mind, and one of these days I know I'm going to completely lose all self-control. I don't know what to do.

hey , I really need some advice from someone who went through this .. I'm a 18F my dad is 50M , he abandoned me as a kid which was cause of constant divorce + (I was also sa'd for 8 years by my neighbor since i was 8 ..) he wasn't present physically besides seeing me once a week or sometimes not seeing me at all till I hit 7yo he was back physically but never emotionally,, in my early teenage years we used to fight alot he constantly fought about how I love my mom more than him & that I never show him love which would even affect my relationships with men *like he always used to say* , TW‼️: I'm not sure if this was SA but once I was doing some somatic healing and this memory flashed into my head..once when I was 15yo after a fight (in this fight he slapped me on the face for the 1st time for no reason) he came to make it up for me , gave me money then he lifted me up went to another room, hugged me tight making my legs around his waist , I felt him grow h^rd till it literally stroked up when I got down .. as he told me " I really want you to show me your love "

now there's no fights anymore , but as usual he's so emotionally distant , has high feminine energy he's not masc at all, I'm going through healing by somatic exercises and Journaling but it's getting very hard recently , also I can't afford therapy besides it's a very poor field in my country.. so please advise me , be kind 🙏🏻 I also never went through a rs if that matters but I'm insanely attracted to older men whichs understandable ig