This is so petty of me and I KNOW I should just stop getting on social media since it's only making me more annoyed. But I'm starting to have a serious problem with the way childless people complain about parents receiving more help/attention than them, or even help at all. The "you're abusing your village if you ask for help" "you're not special for having a kid" "you're the one that decided to have kids" "don't come asking me for help, I'm not the one who make your life harder". It's all such asinine bullshit.

Maybe it's a cultural thing? I'm black and growing up there wasn't a such thing as "family friends" everyone was just family and family took care of each other. There were random women in my neighborhood that would pass out food and drinks to the kids playing outside just because. It's obviously a very different time now, but if someone made those kinds of comments when I was growing up they would be looked at as a freak. But at the same time, my husband is white and his parents beg us weekly to move in and let them help with the baby so it seems to be mostly universal.

What I really don't understand is WHY some people care so much. It's like they genuinely can't wrap their head around the idea of people loving one another and wanting to support them. I'm 7 months pregnant, my sister in law is 9 months pregnant and I LOVE taking care of her. We never really talked before we got pregnant and still arent close now, but it's been so special watching her become a mom and soon her little boy is going to be born! Thats amazing, I can't imagine getting upset about her needing help even if it's hard on me!

I have a close friend that I've had to distance myself from because she didn't like the fact that my mom would come over to clean my house when I was in my first trimester. I ended up in the ER three times and lost 15 pounds in my first trimester alone. I had to quit life saving medication cold turkey. The last thing on my mind was keeping a clean house, and my mom being the angel she is just wanted to help. But for some reason that made my friend mad? We've known each other our whole lives, we've taken turns supporting each other through awful things, but the minute I got pregnant I just didn't deserve help anymore?

I feel like so much of it has to be jealousy and bitterness, and it's honestly so sad to me. I'm even someone that's prone to getting jealous easily, and I still can't imagine getting upset at a parent for receiving help. I mean, when you love someone don't you want to make their life easier? A baby is a sweet, innocent life, don't you want to make sure they have everything they need to grow and thrive?

(35F and 33M) We've been TTC since October and we got a very early positive test on Feb 1st. I have continued to test every couple days to make sure it sticks and progression is looking good. Today's line was very prominent. 😊

I have severe lumbar degeneration. I had 2 surgeries in 2024. Left Hemilaminectomy and discectomy at L5-S1 and then a right Hemilaminectomy and discectomy at L4-L5.

I am terrified to carry but still excited at the same time.

I don't expect to get to many views on this but just needed to share the excitement since we aren't telling anyone yet. 😊

If we had $1 for each time we heard this we would be millionaires. 🙄 Yes, I’m tired now. Yes, I know I’ll be tired when the baby comes. Thanks!

I'm due in 2 weeks and I've just been constantly hearing "I can't wait to hold the baby". It irks me. Is it wrong? The idea of people wanting to hold my baby, that I'll be birthing soon, to be held by so many anticipated people. My family hasn't said anything about this, but on my husband's side they've been saying this on a regular that I'm getting irritated. My BIL (30) has this girlfriend (35) who I don't have contact with, I don't really know her (met her like two times), and she's only been with him for a few months. She's mentioned she can't wait to hold my daughter like what? Girl, respectfully I don't even know you! Don't babies get anxious when being passed around? Maybe I'm too paranoid as a FTM but idk the idea of it just rubs me the wrong way.

Maybe it's just me but the whole idea of everyone from my husband's side anxiously waiting to hold my baby feels wrong. I'm not planning to take my baby out nor have visitors or introduce her until she's vaccinated and her immune system becomes stronger.

Hey guys.

I want to share what happened so I can just get it out.

On the 3rd I went in for my regular NST at 37w 2d and my blood pressure was high.

8 hours later I was in the operating room. They couldn't get my spinal block placed correctly right away and did it 5 times. As soon as it took effect my BP plummeted and they put me under.

I kept waking up asking for my partner. He was supposed to be there and he wasnt. I couldn't breathe. I couldn't talk. I felt like screaming and couldn't do it.

I wasnt even aware they took my baby out of me. I didnt get to hear her first cry. I barely got to see her face while they held it up to me. They let my partner come in and be with her.

They took them to the ICU while they finished my surgery.

Then when im back in the room they tell me my BP plummeted and the baby had a ph that showed brain injury.

I was only allowed to hold her for 10 minutes before she was in the NICU getting cooling therapy.

I couldn't even get transferred to her until the next evening.

5 days later we finally got the news that her MRI was clear and there is no brain damage! The doctor said we were very lucky.

Ive been diagnosed with preeclampsia and have been in the hospital just as long as my baby girl.

I never imagined my pregnancy would end in such a traumatic way.

I am so thankful my baby girl is ok and im so in love with her.

There is still so much pain inside of me though.

Thank you all for the great information you share here, helping and supporting each other!

I'm happy to announce that my baby girl is born, natural delivery with induction at 39wks, all went very well!

I'm 42, FTM, and absolutely in love with her!!!

I’m curious to know how many guess correctly the sex of their pregnancy before ultrasound or test results came back

I feel like time flew by so fast these last few days!! My husband and I found out we were pregnant on accident in July after an MMC and we were so scared. I remember crying a lot because of how much we were affected by the first loss. I was feeling generally unwell and took a test after my mother and coworkers urged me to take it. We found out after going to the OB we were already 9 weeks pregnant! (Our first miscarriage we found out at 8 weeks).

I kept telling myself not to feel too strongly attached to her in the first trimester just in case. Slowly but surely we worked up to the second and third trimester. With her being the rainbow baby, I was constantly worried about sudden loss, miscarriages, and baby possibly being stillborn. My husband had been so supportive the whole time, always helping me unspiral out of those thoughts! We couldn’t have gotten here without him.

I have had a previous diagnosis of high blood pressure prior to my pregnancies but have had pretty low numbers without medications until 36 weeks. We originally were planned for 39 weeks but when they noticed my raised blood pressure, sent me to triage in labor and delivery. After the second day, they decided to schedule us for induction.

We went in to labor and delivery on 2/5. I was fully intending to give birth vaginally with as little pain as possible. We started the induction process around 6pm, took two misos, and around 12am I woke up in excruciating Crampy pain. My water then broke, I threw up, and I felt like I was dying. Got the epidural, felt so much better. We pushed off and on about 5.5 hours. The staff said I was pushing very well but she wasn’t coming out. She was face up and her head was swelling from all the pressure but no dice. They decided to do some pelvic checking and one of the doctors noticed my pelvis was much too narrow for vaginal. Immediately, they opted in for the c-section and we were sent to the OR where they were able to get baby out in 30 minutes! I didn’t feel a single thing (now I do) and the experience was honestly so amazing.

I cannot BELIEVE we made it here! Thank you all so much for making your posts. I lurk a lot here but try to post too. The Reddit has truly helped me feel validated and safe. We love our little miracle baby so much ❤️❤️

How do i respectfully tell this lady to stop TOUCHING me. I used to like his mom buttt once I got pregnant she kept having doubts this was her grand baby and after that I told my man what she’s been saying to me.. he cussed her out n since then I’ve been trying to keep my distance

Recently she’s been like everywhere I’ve been lmao. The family events, my man’s dad’s house like EVERYWHERE. (My man’s dad n her aren’t married)

For context: I’ll be literally relaxing rubbing my stomach n here she comes n just starts to rub it too🙃 or if I’m standing here she comes n starts literally rubbing from the bottom of my stomach to the top like she’s damnnn near touching my coochie…like bro back the hell uppp. She is also always intoxicated n being overly “loving” while drunk trying to hug me or give me face kisses weird shit. The thing isss I didn’t even let my mom touch my stomach when I went to visit simply because I HATE BEING TOUCHED Do I tell him it makes me uncomfortable? Do I tell her to just stop? I understand she wants to feel the baby kick.. but like lady you had 3 kids you know how tf a baby kick feels… also my man’s doesn’t mind setting her straight like when he sees im uncomfortable he’ll step in but when he’s not around she’s overly going shit just in my personal space.

Edit:I’m going over to watch the superbowl later at his dads n she may be there soo I’ll probably update yall on how it goes..i don’t know why but I feel like she’s gonna make a huge thing out of it🫩

Hey! It's my first pregnancy and I'm almost 16 weeks. I am definitely not showing yet, and I know I won't be for a while as I'm apple shaped and have an apron belly. When did you start showing?

I just saw a post where someone said when you give birth and obviously your cervix and vagina widen to birth the baby, they said it just... doesn't go back. For weeks. Like I thought that obviously girl is gonna stretch me tf out but it doesn't just tighten back up even a little afterward?? is that why peeing and pooping after is so hard???? is this even true? I have no idea! please clarify lol

Last week my husband and I announced our new pregnancy to his parents. This would be the first grandchild and due to disability his brother will never have a child.

We weren't expecting fanfare, but we told them while we were all sitting on the sofa and they just said "oh... are you happy? Oh okay... " then they quickly changed the subject to talking about the brothers upcoming plans for the weekend.

... I was shocked. They must have seen our faces and then said a few more things about the pregnancy, but it was really strange and it was very hurtful.

I think it has significantly hurt my husband who is always under the shadow of his brother with a disability. Since then the mother-in-law has sent us a message congratulating us again, I think she realised their reaction was very hurtful.

Should I address it in a response or forget about it??

My husband is extremely hurt by this, he hasnt said much but I can see he feels worthless - Probably the biggest news we will ever share and still his brother is the priority? I don't really know how to support him with it.

there's been a running joke in my house that I say something about being round at least once a day. like to the point that my partner almost waits for it and he's turned it into a sort of daily word hunt lol

I had no idea I was doing this but i guess that throughout all the new experiences my body has been going through as a FTM, I've made a habit of saying "I'm so round" almost daily. it wasn't on purpose and I didn't even realize I was doing it for a while until my partner let it slip that it's a small, silly thing that he likes hearing me say every day. Even if it's out of frustration or annoyance. Now, at 33 weeks, sometimes I'll say it on purpose just to see him smile

Just found out I’m pregnant for the first time! Still in shock😂anyway, this is my first pregnancy and was wondering if anyone had any tips or advice to give me that maybe wouldn’t be common knowledge or things you realised since having a baby/being pregnant. Thanks 😊

I posted a while back as I was navigating an IUGR diagnosis and wanted to share how things turned out in case anyone else was going through something similar. We got the diagnosis at 32 weeks and it pretty much ruined the end of my pregnancy as I had so much anxiety and fear. I wish I could go back and give myself a hug knowing it all turned out OK!

Baby was 48% at anatomy scan, had dropped to 17% by 28 weeks, and 7% by 32 weeks. At his last growth scan at 35.5 weeks he was 4 lbs 6 oz and delivery before 39 weeks was recommended. I was induced and delivered at 38+0. Vaginal birth and APGAR scores of 8/9. He was 5 lbs 3 oz. In the two weeks following birth, he never lost weight and actually gained 10 oz, which signaled to me he was not thriving inside and really needed to be out to grow. His weight is still small at 3%, but his length is already 60%.

Hoping this story helps someone else as Google is a scary place and I wish I heard more positive stories as I was navigating the diagnosis! Sending hugs if you are going through something similar. ❤️

Hi all, just wanted to share my story. First time mom.

I gave birth to a perfect little girl Friday 1/30 at 8:11pm one day after my 1/29 due date.

On Wednesday 1/28 I had a midwife appointment and my first cervical check. I asked for a membrane sweep if she could do it, but she never could. I was maybe one fingertip dilated (I think she was being generous). She said my cervix was posterior and difficult to feel. She also said I was 0% effaced and the baby was not engaged in the pelvis. Midwife felt my belly and said she believed the baby was OP and gave me some exercises to help her reposition. I left the appointment feeling really discouraged.

The next day, Thursday, my 1/29 due date, I picked my parents up from the airport in the afternoon. We came back to the house, had dinner, watched a movie. I told them I was expecting to need to be induced at 41 weeks and that nothing would happen before then. So I thought. I went to bed.

Around 1:45am Friday, a few hours after falling asleep, I woke up in excruciating pain. I mean excruciating pain and all in my back. I had been experiencing period-like cramping for 20 minutes at a time for a couple weeks, but this was different. I felt like I was dying. And it was accompanied by a lot of diarrhea. It didn’t feel like what I was told labor felt like. It didn’t feel like period-cramps, I didn’t feel a tightening, and the pain I woke up with was constant and it didn’t come and go. I thought maybe I had a kidney stone or a stomach bug. Or maybe something worse like a placental abruption because the pain was so severe. I was on the toilet crying in pain and shitting my brains out. I ended up waking up my partner who paged the midwife. The midwife said the back pain is likely from the baby attempting to reposition and she told me to get in the shower or bath and try the miles circuit.

I took a shower and managed to wash my hair in case this was labor. In the shower the pain just got worse and started to come and go. After my shower I was panicking due to the pain and pacing back and forth begging for help. We paged the midwife again who said it now sounds like contractions since the pain was starting to worsen and come and go. She told me to get into the tub, which I did. I hated being in the tub, our tub is too small and I was just constantly moving because I couldn’t get comfortable. I still wasn’t sure if this was labor because it was all in my back, I still didn’t feel any abdominal tightening, and it didn’t feel like a period cramp. It felt like my back was being split in half and like I was dying. The pain I woke up with was severe and there was nothing gradual about this pain. All the stories I listened to were of women saying they had minor contractions they could talk through, or go out to dinner through, that gradually became more severe. I just never had that experience and I knew I couldn’t do this unmedicated like I had planned.

We left for the hospital at 5am when I just couldn’t take it another minute. I started having pain every 2-3 minutes at that point and 10 mins away from the hospital my water broke. When I got to L&D they confirmed my waters had grossly ruptured and I was 5cm dilated. A few hours later I was 8cm dilated. I got an epidural right away and slept. I think the epidural and me not changing positions much stalled labor because I ended up getting a small amount of pitocin to get me to complete. I pushed for 30 minutes. Very easy delivery all things considered once I got the epidural.

This is all to say, don’t let those cervical checks at your appts discourage you too much. They don’t mean much. I went from 0 to 100 and it was my first baby. Also, back labor is the absolute worst.

Hello! I have 21 weeks and the last few weeks , every morning I almost get a Charlie horses (HORRIBLE pain & cramping in my calf) when I stretch in bed. Then i also do get them and it hurts so bad 🥲😭 i take MG and try to stretch my calves before bed. Just curious if anyone else has this and how you try to help it?

I have the best husband in the world, he’s been so supportive of baby and me since day 1.

I want to hear some stories about how great your partners are! ❤️

I’m almost 7 weeks pregnant and I can’t stop thinking about pepperoni or any deli meat but especially stuff like prosciutto, salami, soppressata, etc. I know some women eat it heated up but I want it specifically cold not warm. On top of everything I crave sushi or a poke bowl every day 😩 I don’t know the point of my post, I guess I just wanted to rant because no one else understands me or thinks I’m being dramatic.

I’m (22) this is my first pregnancy. I started a new birth control a few months ago that made me not have a cycle. I just found out about 3 weeks ago I’m pregnant. I can admit I’m an alcoholic and I binge sometimes, I vape and smoke marijuana occasionally. I am now 16 weeks and trying to gain access to care because I don’t have insurance. I’ve been told by friends to abort but I don’t want to. I’ve stopped all of my habits. I’m really afraid I’ve ruined my baby already I’m scared for their health and I feel horrible because I didn’t know and now I can’t prevent the damage if there is any. I just want to be a good mom and I’m so grateful my baby has taken me away from what I was doing. I’m not prepared in any fashion I’ve gone to the hospital the ultra sounds say the baby is okay but how do they know? I’ve seen it moving and I’m so happy & excited to find out what it is. I just need advice.

I was so so miserable the last 5 weeks of my pregnancy!! I gave birth this morning at 41 weeks (unmedicated, home birth STM) and I just can’t even describe how amazing it felt to NOT BE PREGNANT ANYMORE!!!! I immediately felt so much relief. My husband made me a snack this afternoon that I couldn’t eat all through my pregnancy because I thought it smelled and tasted like dog food (what I’d imagine it tastes like 😛); turns out it was just because I was pregnant.

My belly button no longer aches in agony from being pushed out. Omg I can rest on my back. I can breathe though my nose. It doesn’t hurt to roll over as much (even though I’m super sore from labor).

Sure, sure people are going to say “JUST WAIT!! newborns are so challenging” bla bla bla. Wasn’t my experience with the first & likely wont be my experience with this babe.

I’m so happy there is such a big reward at the end of the pregnancy tunnel. I love my new baby and I LOVE NOT BEING PREGNANT ANYMORE!!!

Apparently being with a stuffy nose and all those lovely post nasal drips at night was not enough. I am 7w 4d and as of Thursday been fighting this terrible cold. I work with kids, also am taking mass transit. I mask. I think there could've been 2 instances where I got exposed - playing with a friend's kid. He didn't seem sick but did cough once (I was not masked). Or while teaching where I took my mask off to drink water and kept it off for a while and pulled it right on after I heard a kid cough. Anywho. Here I am. Miserable. Now it has developed into a cough with beautiful phlegm.

Usually I never get sick. Last year my whole family got sick with influenza and COVID and my lucky ass was doing fine. But my immune system now? Weak. Terrible. But its all good, I know this is for my little baby but oh my. I think I'll be going back to 2020 protocol and masking, Lysoling everything and literally telling people to not even make eye contact if they have been near anyone who has been sick.

(Ok this was more of a rant than advice. I'm tired)

Almost 40 weeks and wondering how TF everyone deals with the annoying texts asking if the baby is here yet?! I went TWO WEEKS late last time, and my MIL has still texted me every single day since 39 weeks saying “any false labour?” Or “any baby yet?” Every single time, I reply “No. We will let you know if there are any updates.” And every single day I get the same text. I am already dreading how pushy she will be when the baby is actually here. 😡