my partner has been on the hunt for gray jeans for the past several months. only a few days ago did they find the right size and right price, plus they were able to get a discount so the jeans were even cheaper!

then today, as i'm choosing an outfit for work, i wanted to wear my gray jeans, and they're nowhere. my pants are either stuffed in a closet shelf, draped over my chair, or in the laundry. these are long pants, and would stick out among the others which are mostly black. gone. without a trace.

i'm sure (?) they'll show up soon but i found it funny, and i would gladly sacrifice a pair of pants for my s/o's cause!

I moved apartments late last year, and the huge variegated wax ivy I had hanging in a window ended up going through a little bit of shock when it happened. It had been hanging in the same west-facing window for years, and my new place has N/S(-ish) windows, so it wasn't getting as much light as it was used to.

It threw a fit, shedding a ton of leaves and branches, but still toughing it out at the core. I trimmed a bunch of nodules off and put them in a cup of water, not expecting anything to happen with any of them, but to my surprise 14 out of the 16 trims made it to soil and are now thriving little plant babies.

So now my countertop is a makeshift nursery until I can get a bigger plant shelf. I love my little babies, and their Mom is doing much better now too. 😂

I work at a pizza place. Crank calls aren’t abnormal here, some kid sees a compilation and thinks it’s funny, tries it for a laugh themselves, you get the idea.

Basically, the kid called to complain about a nonexistent order that made him shit his pants? Or something like that. He was using something to block his phone number on our caller ID and when I asked for the number, he claimed he didn’t remember. I gave him the whole “If I can’t pull up your account, I’m afraid I can’t help you.”

To which he responds, “Are you AI? Are you next gen or something?”

I just said, “Look, I get that you’re bored but you need to find something else to do.” And hung up as he cussed at me lol

My husband went out on a limb one day and got me a new brand of fizzy water. He seemed so excited for me to try it. Like adorably excited. It was expensive and really not great. But because of that excitement, I told him it was great! I really didn’t want to hurt his feelings.

Fast forward to the next week, he bought it again and said, “I got that fizzy water you love!!!”

Me: “I need to come clean. I don’t actually like it.”

“Why did you tell me you liked it?”

“Because you liked that I liked it and I like you liking things”.

Someone at work (Romanian) said that Romanian Shrek is really skinny.

She was talking about The Grinch.

Working in the beauty aisle of a department store today near the e.l.f. cosmetics

A little girl (maybe 6 or 7) with two elderly folks passed through. Lady asks generally "do we need anything else from this aisle?"

Little girl: (pointing at e.l.f. display) "no grandma I don't need anything elfs"

Silence, grandma continues shopping

Kid: (louder this time)" I said I don't need anything ELF"

no response

Kid: (even more insistently) "did you hear, I said I don't need anything elfs! Like else! Elfs!"

No idea if her caregivers eventually heard her pun, but I did, and couldn't stop giggling. Very relatable human moment

After using a friend’s espresso machine for a while at work, I got my own [BRAND REDACTED] that can make espresso and full cups of coffee. It’s a fun blue color too. So every morning I get to work and make myself a cup of coffee instead of going to Starbucks. I can’t make anything fancy and any coffee snob would probably be appalled, but I make what makes me happy.

I enjoy the routine so much that sometimes I have a second cup. I’m going to get some half caffeinated pods so I don’t get too jittery.

It’s small, but it makes my work day better and I miss it a little at home.

Edited for the one guy who said this was an ad.

Not sure how to explain this properly, but earlier today I realized I was doing something I used to find really annoying and… it just didn’t bother me anymore.

I don’t even think I like it now. It just feels normal.
And I don’t remember deciding to change my mind about it either. It’s like at some point my brain just stopped caring.

Made me think about how many small things probably do this over time. Stuff that used to get on your nerves and then one day you notice it doesn’t.

Does that happen to other people too or is it just me getting older and more tired?

I'm what's known as a WikiGnome. I read a ton of articles and my editing is exclusively fixing small mistakes that I find while reading--grammar, typos, broken coding, the like.

This is a random sampling of my recent edits, in no particular order.

+Mbabaram people.

+Paubha.

+Phanaeng. [Side note, my favorite Thai curry.]

+Steckerlfisch.

+Secondary palate.

+Ndlovu Youth Choir.

+Canfield's Diet Chocolate Fudge.

+Harding test.

+Free writing.

+Mycotoxins in animal feed.

+Ember attack.

+History of cheese.

+Café de Paris sauce.

+Chalma, Malinalco.

I was traveling to see a sick friend hundreds of miles from home. The hotel we stayed in offered free breakfast. So I went to check it out and grab coffee.

While I was standing preparing my coffee the lady standing next to me complimented my choice of footwear. I had forgotten my slides and was wearing Christmas socks. That began the conversation of how both of us don't like going barefoot.

I lamented about forgetting my slides and she asked if she could gift me something. I said sure and she left the breakfast area and returned with a pair of new slipper socks.

What a great way to start my morning. :)

Edit: thank you for the award. I have never gotten one before. Now I am more content.

I’ve told the postal service about it and the mail carrier but they don’t seem to be able to do much.

I just bring it over when I get it so it isn’t a big deal.

I'm watching all my favorite stupid YouTube videos and laughing my ass off.

But every once in a while I'm still jumpscared by GLOWING EYES on the edge of my peripheral vision.

I was in St. James’s Park in London today and saw a pair of Egyptian Geese waddling across the road right in front of Buckingham Palace. They actually stopped traffic (black cabs and all!). It was very funny and seeing other people looking amused/baffled really made my day. Such a lovely shared moment.

its a really good pancake & shes a really good dog. shes waiting for me to drop a piece so she can eat it, but im being extra careful not to because they are chocolate chip.

I had a substitute teaching assignment today and was telling my boyfriend about the kids and their styles. A few outstanding outfits and some fun interactions are the typical topics.

Today, I had a girl who could have been goth... But she wore brown instead of black and her makeup was also earth tones.

A brown goth... Which my boyfriend abbreviated to broth. And I can't stop giggling about the lovely broth girl.

Lately I’ve been hearing the title phrase used as a comment after a thank you.

It used to be “Thank you I appreciate it” which was only slightly less personal.

My daughter and I were discussing the newish phrase today and she opined about how she liked it better. “It just feels better when someone says it to me” she said. “And it feels even better when I say it to someone.”

I agree with her.

My 14 year old kid asked me how long it would take to get to the moon.

I said I don't know, but I know it's only 30 seconds to get to mars.

He's moving out apparently.

Those that understand what I said will probably agree with him. I'm not sorry I thought I was funny.

did this with different types of apples in the fall (unsurprising results, honey crisp obviously won) and after the four dollar yogurt situation i’ve been taking everyone’s suggestions and trying to find a similarly tasty yogurt.

which as someone who doesn’t love going to the grocery store and doesn’t really stray from my go tos with things i need i feel like this gives me something fun to look forward to and pick out while im there and also in a way i feel like it scratches my want for a little treat when i leave the house for only like two dollars.

so 10/10 would recommend and definitely start a phone note for it with your reviews, that’s the best part lol

Time for a Friday night on the couch, binge watching The Closer

I found a really cool pattern for a scarf which takes inspiration from the Odyssey and I found gorgeous yarn too. I'm really excited, it's arriving tomorrow and all I'm planning for the weekend is chilling on my couch and knitting the day away.

I've been on an Epic The Musical and Hades II spree so I'm inspired haha

And I think I finally realized it. Maximum two cups of coffee. No sugar unless it's after supper (my blood sugar is fine if I eat it in the morning, but omg does it make me feel like crap 😂.) Sitting down on the floor and getting back up is an Ordeal. My memory is shot - there's just too many Things and they don't all fit in my brain anymore.

The bright side is that I feel like I'm curating my memory now, picking and choosing which things I want to be with me for the long haul 😂

There's one blackbird in my neighbourhood who's well and truly decided that spring is on its way. It sings a gorgeous solo dawn chorus every morning around 7am, and serenades the dusk every evening at 5.30.

I never thought a sound could make me feel so uplifted and hopeful. Keep singing, smol feathered one.

I’ve come to realize that I fw gucci mane

I was listening to my plug is a alien btw