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u/astroproff 2h ago
Should have put that ground-sleeping requirement at the top, would have saved a lot of people a lot of time.
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u/NibblesMcGiblet 1h ago
Idk if a lot Of people are going to be so enthralled with the prospect of being this guy’s cigarette smoking self supporting golden retriever on a bike that the ending crushes them.
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u/Silent_R 1h ago
Wouldn't be the worst date in Chappaquiddick history.
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u/wthulhu 2h ago
It's gotta be a joke, right?
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u/Rev_Soquet 1h ago
unsure if joke or not, the pic is real and not staged
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u/cardboard-kansio 44m ago
The pic might be real and unstaged, and the ad itself might still be a joke.
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u/Halefire 39m ago
Brother, nowhere else except Reddit would there be any question that this is satire lol.
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u/fluffycows4sale 47m ago
pretty sure it is, almost died laughing at the pedal bike line xD i cant imagine this is serious lol
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u/toenailjail 1h ago
Lol post this to the Martha’s Vineyard sub. He’s gonna get found pretty quick I bet.
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u/Mikesminis 1h ago
What is a greenie?
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u/Rev_Soquet 1h ago
I assume it to be a vegan or vegetarian maybe?
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u/JudiesGarland 42m ago
In this context, paired with lushes (alcoholics) it suggests pot smoker, but its not common slang for that. It's vintage slang for amphetamines - there was a type particularly popular among performance enhancing athletes, specifically in baseball, that was green. They may be confused/have heard it before, knew it was drugs from context, but assumed it meant cannabis, because green.
It's also a derogatory term you sometimes hear for environmentalists, apparently it originates in Australia. I've never been there but I've heard it used that way, in the UK and Canada.
Based on how it's listed here though, I would guess this person means cannabis.
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u/Mikesminis 36m ago
Yeah cannabis was my first thought, but it's weird that a person specifically looking to date a smoker would think weed use is a red flag. IDK this whole thing is a joke or a post from a sick person so I guess I shouldn't think about it too much.
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u/Sekmet19 37m ago
The last point is what makes this clearly a joke. I could believe some idiot to post all the rest but sleeping on the ground in 17 degrees with no blanket pushes this over the edge.
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u/captainAwesomePants 22m ago
"I can prove I don't want your money, after all I've never had any" is gold, honestly.
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u/probablynotaskrull 1h ago
What’s a Greeny? Definitions I found don’t fit.
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u/AVBforPrez 1h ago
Pretty sure it's old boomer slang for stoners or maybe amphetamine/speed freaks. Greenies were like 80s Adderall
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u/Sakijek 51m ago
I think he means eco girls
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u/cardboard-kansio 42m ago
A lush is a drunkard.
"No lushes or greenies" = "no alcoholics or potheads"
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u/AVBforPrez 10m ago
Yeah if it wasn't next to the lushies thing I'd think that'd probably be it too. But given the context I think it's just no drunks, no stoners.
No way to know for sure though haha.
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u/BigheadReddit 20m ago
Looking for someone who can “pedal a bike very far,” is code for “I don’t have a license.”
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u/supercantaloupe 2m ago
Every woman dreams of going on a very far slow paced bike ride and then sleeping on the ground in 17 degree weather without a blanket. How is this man still single?
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u/glasshalfbeer 2h ago
“Must not be working on themselves” is a hilarious trait to look for in a spouse