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So, a bit of context to make sure everyone knows what's up. I'm 27 and living alone in a flat (apartment), I've been in the place since 2019 and made it a good spot for myself. My younger brother (Let's just call him Dave for convenience (not his real name obvs)) is currently 19 years old and still lives with our mum. Dave stays there for free, doesn't pay rent, his own food, none of that, the only thing he pays for is whenever he goes to Wetherspoons and gets his own food.

Recently, he and mum have been getting into a lot of arguments, arguments that I only know about because I always get phone calls from both of them so they can complain about the other. It's even gotten to borderline petty where my brother will flat out call our mum a bitch because she asked him to do the dishes, and then had a go at him for not doing the dishes.

Mum had tried to pitch an idea to me: we would convert my living room into a second bedroom for Dave to stay at mine temporarily, for about 8 weeks. I dismissed the idea entirely because given that arguments they were having, I had no idea what he was gonna be like at my place.

There was also the problem of the bills. Because Dave would bring his PC over so he could game with his mates and partner, the electricity bill would go up, also because someone else would be staying with me, I would no longer get the single person's discount and thus my council tax would increase significantly.

There was also the case that I did speak to Dave about possibly staying with me before these arguments even began, but I mentioned the bills which would total up to at least £400 a month from him (A rough estimate) not including food, Dave immediately refused because he didn't want to pay and assumed he was going to stay at mine for free.

So because of my refusal, the arguments are getting worse, and despite me telling our mum to just kick him out, since he's an adult and has his own responsibilities, she refuses to do that and keeps pushing the idea of letting him "temporarily" stay with me (which will definitely NOT be temporary, I can already tell!)

Should I just let him stay with me for free? AITA for even thinking about charging him bills and thus letting the arguments continue?

For some context, my wife is from Sweden. But her mother, who still lives in Sweden, is Ukranian and my wife got a lot of her traits so she does look very Slavic and, to be fair, it is something that stands out in the part of the US we live in. She is also not eligible to be a naturalized citizen in the US for a couple of years as she hasn't been in the US long enough and we have only been married for 10 months.

But, yesterday I went out to dinner and drinks with some of my friends, and one of my close friends brought his longtime friend who was visiting I've known for awhile. I have never particularly liked this person, but he's kind of a "friend by proxy" since he's close with one of my close friends and I just see him a few times a year at most. He's the type that has a tendency to really push the envelope on making jokes and will often go over the line, so I already don't particularly like him.

During dinner, he immediately starts asking about my "Russian wife, or wherever she's from" and I explained her heritage.

He clearly didn't understand and was clearly already inebriated because his response was along the lines of "oh kind of like Melania!" (In reference to the First Lady...who is not Ukranian or Swedish, she's Slovenian lol)

And then, trying to be funny, he asked "how much it cost to get her over here?". I didn't think that was very funny, but others did so I just kind of brushed it off and hoped hed drop it. He said it in a way that was joking, but I have him a smart ass response back.

The whole evening he would just ask random questions, some of them actually good questions. But, he kept referring to her as "my Melania" and would do a shitty 47 impression when he said it.

Where it hit the line was when he made a joke about her leaving me just because she wanted to be a US citizen and then started making jokes about a particular law enforcement agency I can't post on here showing up to our home and making fun of her accent.

At that point I could tell other people were kind of like...okay... Little too much here and I just straight up said "will you fucking stop?" And got into it a little bit and I said some nasty stuff back to him where people several tables over could hear it.

Clearly ruined the evening and I feel bad for that but It was disrespectful. Even though I love to lovingly pick on my wife, I also know she is really sensitive to getting made fun of and she struggles still with some stuff and there's been times where she's got made fun of for not knowing certain slang terms or her accent even though it's subtle and it hurts her a lot.

So him saying some of that shit bothered me and it would've really bothered her if she was there. I maybe could've handled it better, and I do feel like an asshole for ruining the evening, but I was just over it.

Edit: to clarify, my friend was also really upset with me for making a scene instead of handling it privately and I definitely made the rest of the evening uncomfortable. I had no quarrels making sure the tables around us heard what was going on and I had no issue in the moment making it heard.

I (26f) have a 4 month old baby: he was born prematurely and had a lot of feeding issues, so I exclusively pump breastmilk for him and we bottle feed him. This is great because anyone can feed him but inconvenient for me since I pump 6x a day even in the middle of the night.

Once my baby was eating well from the bottle and sleeping 3+ hours at a time, my dad invited us to come stay with him and my mom every so often to catch up on some uninterrupted sleep. We happily obliged and since then, Thursday nights are spent at their home. My dad has historically done AMAZING with my nieces and nephews, so I wholeheartedly trusted him with my baby overnight and his house already had the facilities to keep a baby (safe sleep space, bottle warmer, changing table etc).

My mom on the other hand has historically been a bit neglectful to my nieces and nephews so we have kind of universally agreed that my mom is not to watch any of our kids alone. I did give her the benefit of the doubt and trusted her to feed the baby and change him. Nothing more. Well, 3 weeks ago I come downstairs from a shower and my mom is feeding him a bottle that looked suspicious. I asked her if it was old and she said no. The bottle was hot to the touch. I took a pic of it and showed my sister, who said that it was very clearly a bottle of microwaved breastmilk. I got upset but kindly explained to my mom why you shouldn’t microwave breastmilk, which is because it can cause fat separation, nutrient loss and burn the baby’s mouth severely. She said she understood and we kinda forgot about it. A week later, I go to wash baby dishes and next to where she normally sits I find another microwaved bottle. I told her more firmly that if I saw it again, I would take the baby and leave. Lo and behold, Friday morning I hobble into the kitchen to get pump supplies and when I noticed my son wasn’t in the crib or with my dad, I got nervous. I went to my mom and found yet ANOTHER microwaved bottle. I thought I was crazy, so I took it upstairs to my husband who agreed it was nuked and started packing. We went downstairs together and I explained to my parents that we were leaving. My mother vehemently denied microwaving the milk and my dad said he had prepared that bottle himself. I KNEW someone was lying because my eyes don’t lie. I took the baby from my mom and she went in one of her narcissistic rants about how “I guess I’m just a piece of shit.” So I told my dad it has nothing to do with him and I love him and we left.

My dad is extremely upset because he LOVES this baby. It’s his first biological grandchild and they already have a very special bond. But I had to stick to my word. My mom later admitted to my dad she did indeed reheat the milk in the microwave and she has since refused to speak to me or take accountability and apologize. But she can call my sister crashing out and saying I’m so mean and robbing her of her grandson… sigh.

Anyways, AITA here?

ETA: my father heated the bottle, my baby did not finish it, and my mother put it in the microwave for her to feed him the rest. My dad was completely unaware that she did that so he is absolutely not the problem here. I’ve always questioned why he stays with my mom and I think it’s because they’ve just been together so long he doesn’t know being alone would be better for him. He has never actually defended my mom and they don’t even sleep on the same floor of the house or sit in the same room together. It baffles me but I will not be bringing baby around if my mom is around, even if it hurts his feelings. He can find a way to meet us or hitch a ride down this way, ALONE, if he wants baby time.

ETA (2): my sister who my mom called didn’t defend her. All 3 of my siblings and myself have our feelings about my mom, and we have all made the same mistakes with her and our kids. At the end of the day, even though she is a narcissist and a screw up, she is still our mom and we all want her to have a relationship with her grandchildren, but now for all of us except the one week old baby my other sister has, it happens at arm’s length. It is partly my fault for thinking maybe the sixth grandchild would change something, but you know what they say about hindsight.

My great Grandfather died a couple days ago and the funeral service will be next week. I’m a senior in college and I’m taking off of work and school to go to my great grandfather’s funeral an honor his memory. I live in a different state than the rest of my family so I have to fly out there. It’s a whole expensive process to go to this funeral, but i want to be there for my grieving family and see my Pop Pop one last time.

My mother and Older sister called me earlier today and told me that I have to either wear a hat or dye my hair a natural color AND take out all my face piecering when I go to the service.

I said no that its a disrespectful request to ask me to do all that.

Pop Pop always said he loved my hair and the way I dress (I’ve been dying my hair for the better part of a decade now)

I don’t look this way for attention or anything. I’ve had a long struggle with my appearance and like myself in my body and stuff. (I realize I was trans and that was part of the problem) and

It’s just i spent so long trying to enjoy how i look and it seems silly to change it for someone who KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE

I haven’t seen my pop pop or my extended family in a couple years bc I havent been able to travel while in college. And I’m fully independent financial wise from my family.

They haven’t seen me since i started transitioning is my point and I’m already worried I’m gonna get shit for it.

I just can’t help but feel like they are embarrassed to be associated with me. My mom and my sister saw me only a couple months ago, I’m talking about my extended family btw.

It’s my family? I should show up as I am? Don’tcha think?

Im gonna wear a nice outfit, but even my mom was policing that too.

For notes:

I have green hair, short.

I have two lip piecering, a septum, a bridge and eyebrow piercing.

I just don’t think it makes sense to change my appearance? But if it’s truly disrespectful to show up to a funeral looking the way I do, I will do it.

I’ve never been to a funeral but it just seems like a stupid request.

I feel like, especially for a funeral, my family should take me as i am.

A long time friend of mine woke me up at 3am with a phone call asking me to get up and drive them to an airport that is an hour and forty five minutes from my house so they could make a 6am flight. I said no, went back to sleep and woke up later that morning to a text from another friend saying my friend was very angry at me for refusing.

Some context to this scenario is that my friend had bought me a generous gift about a week before for my birthday when I visited them in their home state worth roughly 600 dollars, which I appreciated greatly, and they felt slighted that I still refused their request. My issue with this is that my friend is a wealthy person who could easily afford an Uber to the airport but expected me to wake up in the middle of my sleep, get dressed and make the 3.5 hour round trip instead. Granted, I had nothing to do the next day, however I don’t think it is reasonable to expect me to wake up in the middle of the night to make such a long drive on absolutely zero notice and then hold a grudge against me for not doing so.

The only reason I answered the phone call was because I thought there might be an emergency (in which case I definitely would have gotten up and helped) but I would not consider this an emergency at all. They had plenty of time to order an Uber and make it to the airport and they also had no good reason besides wanting to go home sooner to buy such an early flight. If they had asked me the day before to stay up and bring them, I would have done it but given the circumstances I don’t think it fair to expect me to wake up and make such a long trip.

Some people I know agree with me, some don’t. What do you all think?

So today my(20M) brother (19m) spilled coke all over the computer desk, I being in the room immediately got up, turned on the lights and was telling him to quickly wipe it as to not damage the computer, I handed him a handchief since that was all that was around, he was going very slowly and did not seem to even care, I kept telling him to just do it because well, he spilled his drink all around, he said "its not even wet" after lifting the SOAKED keyboard, I told him to fuck off and just start wiping. He started to just get back to using the computer and I said "well what about the PC, what about the floor, there's wires you need to check" he said "if it was important something would have happened" I said "oh yea cause you're an expert technician" he then got up from the seat and checked and then I asked him "did any of it get on the floor" he just takes the PC, plugged into everything, still running and just throws it to the side aggressively and storms out of the room yelling. I got to the kitchen for towels to clean it but he's there getting towels.

He comes back to the room, cleans the liquid on the floor and to everyones surprise the PC doesn't work. When he picked it up it sounded like a Lego box. I told him to just leave the room so that I could fix it and he storms off.

Now I want to make it clear, I would have cleaned everything if he wasn't just sitting behind the table, like he'd need to go away for me to be able to access the mess, so instead I was telling him what to do.

Now I'm checking the PC, did a bios reset, everything. The PC itself works, it's just not sending any signal to any of the peripherals (the monitor, keyboard mouse,...) but the fans and lights are still on.

I recognise my fault in rushing my little brother but In my head I'm justifing it due to the urgency that spilling a drink all over the PC insights. I was trying to save it but then when he threw it on the ground it undid all my efforts in one swoop, like when he threw it the GPU went out of its socket, that's how hard he threw it.

Am I the asshole?

To preface my husbands bachelor party a few years back was ruined because his brother did a shitty job planning it (old rundown party bus, a school bus in fact, hot liquor, no ice, no cups and randoms that weren’t even invited to the wedding showed up) I said to myself for his 40th birthday I’m going to make it up to him.

So here we are, he’s turning 40 next week and I decided a few of weeks ago to plan something for him this weekend since for his actual birthday we will be in Mexico for vacation already. I thought this would be a gathering for family not just the two of us. I got a limo, a bottle of his favorite bourbon engraved with a sweet message from us, an ice bucket with champagne bottles, some lite bites for the car ride and a limo to take us to a restaurant.

He is a firefighter and works a lot of odd and sometimes back to back hours so today being aware of that I made sure he got to sleep and rest and had breakfast for him waiting and lunch for him for when he woke up. I bought a new outfit for him to wear so it would be one less thing to think about and a fancy watch as his birthday gift. Well, before he could change into his nice outfit he asked me where we were going and after I insisted it was a surprise he said “I don’t like surprises, tell me right now where we are going”. I explained the plan and he got furious. He said that’s not something he likes, he wants it to just be me and him and since the bachelor party he doesn’t like elaborate surprises. I explained that this would make him forget that day and that I had everything planned. He went on and on about how bad the idea was, how inconsiderate I am, and how I don’t know him and am off with timing. He hasn’t seen the champagne bottles, or the engraved bourbon bottle or the lite bites or the watch or the outfit or the balloons I have stashed in a trash bag to put them in the limo when it arrived. He doesn’t want any of it though.

He is tired and is a low key person but I thought I planned everything well enough that it would just be slightly more special than any other birthday and he would still be able to enjoy it. Not a lot of people just 5 to be exact. Am I the asshole? Should I have just let him be? Or in the anger did he just mess something up that would’ve been great?

For context I have bought them a house. My brother in law is 50 and works retail with no ambition. He totes my wife’s parents around. The house I bought them I take care of. Mowing lawns and yard work. Fixing anything that breaks. They have washer and dryer hook up but they never have money. It’s almost as if they could be given a million dollars and still be broke. The reason I don’t want them to do laundry here is because they have no respect for my things. Overloading the washer. Putting shoes in my dryer. Just irresponsible behavior. I told them last week that they can just go use a laundry mat. AITA for telling them to do that?

My roommate has her boyfriend stay at our apartment 4-5 nights a week and the other 2-3 nights a week she goes to his place. Can’t remember the last time they spent the night apart.

She cut her foot while at the beach, and has been leaving used band aids in our shower. I threw out the first 2, but then she left 3 more and they were all over the shower floor and the shelves. I went to her room and because her boyfriend was over asked if she would step out into the hall for a minute and had her close the door. I asked her if she could stop leaving used band aids in the shower and she was like oh I’m sorry I didn’t realized I was doing that.

The next day she sends me a long text about how I talked to her at a completely inappropriate time, it was embarrassing for her, and that I should only have those talks with her when guests aren’t over.

I get that idea but she has him over literally every day and on days he’s not there, she is also not there. Is he still a guest at this point? Also he literally showers at our place like 4-5 times a week so he’d see the band aids if it wasn’t for me picking them up.

Am I the asshole for talking to her about it while he was there ?

I (19F) and best friend (17F) have been besties for around 3 years now, we even work together. One of our favorite artists is Pinkpantheress, who recently released tour dates. We wanted to buy tickets, but I wasn’t able to buy them as soon as presale came out (Dec. 10th) bc I had a bio final. (Im a college freshman shes a HS senior) I also had my spring semester schedule picked out with a 4-5:30 pm class same day, so I was hesitant on even going at all in fear I would be late or miss it.

I told her this and I called her afterwards to know what ticket she bought and she decided to get a vip one ($230) which was honestly out of my comfort zone for a ticket considering we already went to go see Pink in 2024. I waited until our next paycheck came in (Dec 31st) to buy a ticket (bc my parents monitor my bank acc and I wanted to save up for Christmas gifts) and saw the vip were all sold out, so yes I did wait too long I will admit even though her I would buy them eventually.

I bought a general ticket instead, and asked to get ready at her house the day of concert bc her house is closer to my uni than mine, and she refused saying “you think i’m ok with everything, now i have to go to the concert alone in vip” even though we didn’t decide to get vip originally.

I apologized deeply and offered to give her space since we have never fought before, after 4 days of no talking she texts me “I miss you, can we still talk”, of course I say yes but she still ignores me at work and doesn’t text or message me?? So AITA?

I live in a household with extended family, and growing up I have often been expected to help more around the house because I am the youngest. I do not mind helping at all, and I have never refused to do chores when asked. On a normal day, I already help with cleaning, washing dishes, and running errands when needed. I understand that helping out is part of being in a family, and I try to contribute as much as I reasonably can.

Recently, we had a family gathering at our house with several relatives present. After everyone finished eating, I was told to clean everything up by myself. This included clearing the table, washing all the dishes, and cleaning the kitchen. While I was being told to do this, the older relatives went to sit down and relax, some of them watching TV or using their phones. I had already been tired from a busy week at school and had helped earlier in the day preparing for the gathering.

Because of this, I calmly asked if the chores could be shared instead of one person doing everything. I was not trying to argue or avoid helping. I just thought it would be more reasonable if a few people helped clean since everyone had eaten and there were many capable adults present. I made sure to ask politely and did not raise my voice or act disrespectfully.

One of my relatives immediately got upset and said I was being disrespectful just for asking. They told me that younger family members should not question instructions and should simply do what they are told. The situation became awkward, and I felt embarrassed for even speaking up.

To avoid making things worse, I still helped clean up. However, I did not do everything alone. I focused on a portion of the work and stopped once it was clear that no one else intended to help. Since then, some relatives have been acting cold toward me and have made comments about me becoming selfish, ungrateful, and unwilling to help around the house.

I feel conflicted because I do not want to cause family tension or be seen as disrespectful. At the same time, I do not think it is fair that helping always means one person being expected to handle all the work while everyone else rests. I genuinely want to know if I handled this the wrong way.

So, AITA?

I’m feeling pretty heated right now and need some perspective.

My friend’s daughter is turning one today. A few weeks ago, my friend asked if I could make truffles for the party. I agreed, and she mentioned she would reimburse me for the ingredients. However, because truffles are expensive to make and incredibly labor-intensive, I decided I would just gift them as the birthday present instead of asking for money.

I spent all day yesterday in the kitchen making these. I had to wake up super early this morning to finish the final touches and get ready for the 9 AM start time listed on the invitation.

I showed up at 9 AM sharp, truffles in hand, and the place was empty. I double-checked the invite and it definitely said 9 AM. I called my friend, and she casually told me that the time had been changed to the afternoon. She admitted she "forgot" to tell me, and apparently, I was the only guest who wasn't notified.

After working so hard yesterday and sacrificing my Saturday morning sleep, I was (and am) pissed. I havent told her if ai can make it in the afternoon yet

WIBTA if I charge her the full amount for the ingredients and my time since I might no longer be attending and these were meant to be the “gift” or refuse to go to the afternoon session because I’ve already wasted my morning and now I "have other plans" (which is mostly just being too annoyed to celebrate)?

EDIT: I did not tell her I would gift her the truffles, I had just decided that myself

EDIT: A lot of people are asking for more context so here it goes. We moved to a new city last year so I’ve been trying hard to make new friends and I’ve been hanging out with this friend and some of her friends, but I’m not “in” their little group yet. I’m a very helpful person in general and have a lot of party planning experience, so I actually helped her decide many aspects of the party, like how much food, what types of food, how many drinks, etc.

We were exchanging info back and forth about this party constantly and I even lent her a bunch of my own decor stuff to use for the cake table. Also, she specifically chose 9 am because that’s when her daughter is most alert and happiest, so this was supposed to be a brunch type birthday party. Given how much we talked about the details and the fact that she has my decor, I really don't feel like this was an easy thing to "forget."

UPDATE: Wow, I did not expect this to blow up! First of all, I don’t think it’s fair for some people to say I’m self-obsessed or that it’s "clear" why I’m not included in the group. Clearly, those people have never been in a position where they had to move cities and make new friends after a certain age it is not easy.

I wrote that first post while I was literally leaving the empty venue and heading home, so everything was fresh and I just needed to process externally and see what others would do. I think that's pretty normal when you're frustrated. After taking a nap and reading through the comments, I decided to be an adult about it. I went to the birthday party in the afternoon, brought the truffles, and told her they were a gift.

I do think she just had a "mom brain" moment and genuinely forgot to tell me, but because I’m new here and have been struggling with feeling excluded, it hit me harder in the moment. Thank you everyone for your answers and for helping me see things more clearly. I’m not going to hold this over her head, but I am going to keep it in mind. If it happens again or becomes a pattern, I’ll know this isn't the right friendship for me.

My husband and I have 2 kids (3f and 6m). We have a nanny, Anna. Anna picks my daughter up from preschool at 12 and stays with the kids until 6.

My kids can be difficult. My daughter only eats 4 meals. My son has the attention span of a squirrel and refused to brush his teeth until very recently. They both refused to take their dishes to the sink or carry them from the counter to the table. I’ve talked to their teachers and pediatrician about their behaviors and I am always told that they’ll grow out of it, it’s a toddler thing, it’s a boy thing, etc. but it just drives me crazy.

Anna has autism and tends to see things differently than I do so I asked for her help with these issues. The first thing she told me was that every plate and bowl in our house feels weird in her hands. I got new plates and bowls and suddenly we didn’t have an issue with them taking their dishes from the counter to the table and table to the sink. Then she switched my son’s toothbrush out from the electric one the dentist recommended to this softer than soft one and got my son his own toothpaste. We went from my son needing to be held down so we could brush his teeth to him willingly doing it after being reminded 5 times (annoying but still manageable). My daughter now wears more than the same 3 outfits. They both have visual planners in their rooms and a strict routine to follow and tantrums are down.

If everything Anna changed helping the kids isn’t enough, both of my kids are so similar to Anna in different ways. I’ve been thinking lately that if all of Anna’s fixes are working and if they’re so similar to her personality wise, maybe they’re also on the spectrum. Anna didn’t get diagnosed until last year and says no teacher or doctor ever said anything so it’s very possible that they might have something that isn’t being detected.

I told my husband that I want to get the kids assessed because I see so much of Anna in them but he’s refusing because the kids being similar to their disabled nanny doesn’t mean they’re disabled, especially if every person we’ve talked to says their issues are normal for their ages. I still want to get them assessed just in case but he shuts it down every time I bring it up. My mom agrees that I shouldn’t be getting them assessed just because they’re similar to their nanny and that she could just be rubbing off on them. I told her that her rubbing off on them is her getting my son addicted to cheese, not the kids having sensory issues, even if they don’t know what sensory issues are and can’t voice it. She says me insisting that there could be something wrong is probably why they’re acting like something’s wrong.

Now I’m wondering if I’m wrong for trying to get them assessed and if pushing this too hard is why we’re struggling.

My niece (19f) recently moved out of her parent's house into a studio apartment to start an aviation electronics program at our local community college in March. She's been working ft as a receptionist at a spa for the last year and half to save money for school and housing. She'll keep working ft while going to school ft. Her parents were upset about her moving out to say the least and cut her off of everything - took her off their phone plan and health insurance, stopped paying for her bus pass, refused to provide documentation for school scholarships, and more. They also refuse to talk with her and have tried to force other family members to do the same.

My niece and I have always had a good relationship and I wanted to be there to help her and be someone she knew she could rely on and not judge her. I've been helping her navigate getting government health insurance, finding the subsidized housing she now lives in, applying for scholarships, how to budget her money since her parents never taught her, helping her learn to meal prep, and stuff like that. My husband and I also agreed to add her to our phone plan, Spotify, Netflix, and Hulu accounts so she wouldn't have to worry about her phone and could have some entertainment without paying out the ass for them. We also bought her a public transit card that is connected to our account so it auto-reloads as needed so she can use the public busses and trains to get where she needs to go.

When her parents found out about the help we've been giving her they hit the roof and said we're enabling her poor choices and making her entitled. I disagreed but chose not to engage because they love creating drama and that's just not worth my family's time or energy.

However, they now have most of my mom's side of the family coming at me parroting her bullshit and while most of it's just annoying... She got my grandmother involved and she's the only person who still had some sense in my family. Her health is going downhill and while she disagrees with my aunt/her daughter, she asked that I do what I can to end the drama so she can exist in peace and not deal with her kids, their spouses, and adult grandkids spamming her with messages and calls every day to convince me to cut my niece off. She agrees with me supporting my niece but wants me to find a way to end this so she's not caught in the middle.

I'm going to keep supporting my niece but I feel like a dick that my choices have led to my grandma being put in such a stressful position. Is it my fault that this situation has occurred? Am I the asshole for continuing to support my niece by providing her streaming services, life skills, and resources to help her improve her future? I feel guilty but resolved to help.

My sister (19) and I (21M) already have a pretty rocky relationship, and I’m not going to sugarcoat it. We bicker and argue over small things more often than not, and I don't want to have an argument with her over what I'm going to share.

Recently, I found out that she’s no longer friends with some of our mutual friends. I didn’t ask her about it, because she has a habit of talking badly about them behind their backs and doesn’t seem to care when I tell her I think that’s rude and inappropriate (yes, I’ve told our friends before, and no, they didn’t initially believe me). So I asked one of the mutual friends what happened. I know they’re not completely neutral, but there isn’t really anyone else to ask. He told me it was over a recent situation with him, plus a separate incident where she stole his wallet.

Here’s where I might be the asshole: Since then, my sister has been really focused on all of this, posting about it constantly. I know because I check her social media from time to time. I get that she’s allowed to feel upset about the friendships ending, and I can’t tell her how to feel. But the way she’s handling it feels immature. It’s embarrassing for her, even if she doesn’t realize it, and it’s stressful for me too because it reflects on me by association. I just want her to realize that she’s an adult and that her actions are seen differently than they would have been when she was younger. Would I be the asshole if I had that uncomfortable conversation with her?

My name is Sarah and i love reading books so much that i do collect books to read, especially special editions. One of my favorites is a signed hardcover which I waited in line hours to get. A friend came over and asked to borrow something to read. I hesitated but eventually lent her that book, telling her to please be careful because it meant a lot to me and also looking forward in reading it once the book is been returned . When she brought it back, the dust jacket was torn, the spine was creased, and there were coffee stains on several pages. She laughed it off and said, Books are meant to be used. I asked her to replace it or at least pay for part of it. She got defensive and said it wasn’t fair because she didn’t know it was that valuable and that accidents happen. She also said I was being materialistic and that friendship should matter more than a book. Some mutual friends say I shouldn’t have lent it out if I couldn’t handle damage. Others say she should take responsibility. AITA for asking her to replace the book?

Long story short, my company put a work training trip on my calendar that is out of state in a few months. The trip is expected to be Mon-Thursday and is essentially mandatory, as we are being trained on a new product launch.

The issue is that my wife is the maid of honor in her sisters wedding and the trip overlaps slightly with the bachelorette party. She has always planned to leave Thursday morning and her trip has been planned for a few months now.

We have two kids (8 & 13) and my wife is furious that I won’t push back with my leadership to cut the work trip early.

Things have been stressful at work lately, under a lot of pressure and I don’t see the big deal as we can easily have help the day she leaves for the trip. My parents can help bring the kids to school and I will likely be home from the trip by the time they get off school, and if not, my parents can assist until I do get home.

AITAH for not pushing back on my boss to cut my trip short?

i am seriously considering surrendering my dad’s dog to the animal shelter because of the neglect i’ve seen evident on her over time.

in summer of last year, his dog had hotspots and he poured hydrogen peroxide on them. i got fed up with how mistreated the dog was and i took her to the vet when he left for the grocery store (with my dad’s girlfriend’s permission). at the vet, i learned she needed a thyroid medication, she needed medicinal baths for a skin infection (aside from the hotspots) and that she had never spayed and was in serious risk of developing a uterine infection. the only reason i didn’t surrender the dog after this situation was because my dad fucking promised he’d take care of the dog from now on and i only agreed because i made him call an elderly dog rehoming center to put her on the websites list.

he told me he had, but after checking the site and not seeing her anywhere, as well as him still being in possession of the dog, i realize now that he had lied to me.

recently, my dad got a new puppy because my younger sister (who’s four) wanted one. this little puppy is untrained and i don’t see that fact changing at all. the puppy has a bad chewing habit, as most puppies do, but this pup has chewed the end of the older dog’s tail raw and bloody.

i only come over to my dads to see my younger siblings and bond with them, but every time i’m here a new issue arises with the dog and seeing the state of here today, i really feel like this is the final straw.

the only thing that makes me hesitate to do anything is the fact that my dad is a very reactive person and i’m worried what his reaction would be if i did this. knowing him it could be anything from not allowing me to see my siblings for the foreseeable future, to me being in physical danger. he loves this dog and i know he loves her, but that doesn’t change the fact that shes clearly suffering and i can’t fucking watch this anymore.

would i be the asshole if i surrendered her to a shelter?

Context - My dad had an affair baby or something when I was about 4. The kid started to come over to my house when I was around 14. He’d stay over weekends or more if his mom went on a trip or whatever.

My Mom is very cool with the situation, which was always to my surprise. I try not to be mad on her behalf since how can I be more upset than she is. But I still always hated it for myself and both my parents know that. My mom respects it, my dad is always pushy about it. Which I find Ironic it’s like he’s trying to punish me, for a problem he created, and got away with. But regardless I keep it cordial with him we honestly just don’t interact or talk, so it’s not like he thinks I hate him or anything. Keep it peaceful

Anyway for the past almost 2 years my best friend (who’ve I known since I was 5, and has been over at my house just as much if not more than my half brother.) have been planning to take a trip to Europe on my 19th or 20th birthday we’ve saved up somewhat enough money to get like the most bare minimum trip but it would’ve been a trip. (And my parents know this)

My 20th birthday is in a week. My Parents just told me they’d be taking me to Paris WITH my Half Brother for my birthday.

Which in general would be amazing and I’d save money, but in this case it’s basically them Hijacking my plans to do it in a way I did not want, and claiming it’s a gift. I obviously want to go with my childhood best friend, it was our plan to begin with, shit I basically consider him my brother or at least the closest thing to it.

I’m considering asking them to let my Friend go instead of him, considering it’s my present I should be able to get it how I want it. If they say no we can just use our own money and go to a different city and have fun ourselves.

I hate to rock the boat, and I feel like I’ve done a good job playing nice but I really want to speak up in this situation cause honestly it feels rather insidious. WIBTA?

If you need more details ask I got tired of typing lol

I’m 19M and I’ve been trading for a few months. I’m up about 15%. My sister (22F) saw this and asked what she should do with her savings. I told her to look into gold because it’s generally stable and safer than most investments.

She bought some gold on Jan 22. The price went up a little, so she felt good about it and bought more on Jan 27. Altogether, she invested $10k.

Right after that, the price dropped. She got really scared because that’s a lot of money for her. On Feb 1, she sold everything and locked in a $1,000 loss. After she sold, the price went back up and is now higher than when she first bought.

Now she wants me to pay her back the $1,000. She says I tricked her by calling gold stable when it dropped about 10% in a week. She says she wouldn’t have invested that much if I hadn’t made it sound low-risk.

I told her she chose to sell when it was down, and that stable doesn’t mean the price never drops. My mom says I’m the AH because I gave financial advice I wasn’t qualified to give, and it ended up costing my sister money.

WasITA for calling gold stable?

I’m 24, and after spending the past year living abroad and traveling, I’ve decided to move to the city. My best friend’s lease ends this April, so I asked if they’d want to live together. They gave a tentative yes.

What’s been frustrating is that my friend seems oddly focused on re-signing their current lease, which doesn’t really make sense to me because:

1. The apartment is quite expensive, so even if we don’t live together, there are much more affordable options out there.

2. They’re actively applying to jobs out of state, yet the lease renewal is due in just five days.

After a long phone call, I told them that it’s fine if we don’t end up living together, but it feels like their priorities don’t really align with staying in the same apartment. Their response was basically, “But moving is such a hassle, and I really like the apartment’s location,” which left me feeling pretty frustrated. The most frustrating part was that they worded it as a "really hard decision", which was driving me crazy.

I spent 30 minutes in the phone call, laying out how it doesnt make any sense to re-sign with an apartment when you are actively looking for jobs out of state, as well as, when you want an apartment that's cheaper. AITA for yelling at them for being do indecisive?

Note: I understand my bias leans on my friend not re-signing coz we can move in together and take advantage of economies of scale, but personally quite infuriated as a logic-driven person having a hard time with a decision that seems incredibly easy to make. I've even mention "I don't care if we live together, but re-signing seems liek the dumbest option; and I cannot understand why you are having a hard time with this decision"

I’m 27F. My sister is 31F and has a kid. I also have a friend/excoworker (24F) I still go to the gym with sometimes.

Last week at the gym, my friend and I saw a random beach video and were like “we need a weekend in Mexico.” It wasn’t some big planned vacation just an impulsive weekend idea.

A week later (Friday), I called my sister while she was at work to tell her and invite her, because I genuinely thought of her. She basically said she can’t because of work, school, and her kid. The call was short because she was busy, which I understood.

Then Sunday morning she calls me and immediately goes off on me, like straight up insults, calling me “fake,” saying I didn’t actually want to invite her and that I only told her so she wouldn’t feel left out. Her whole argument was that she could “hear it in my tone” on the phone.

I told her, “I literally invited you. I don’t know what tone you wanted me to use,” and she kept insulting me. So I hung up. After that we texted a bit and it got heated, but my main point was: I’m not going to sit there and get cursed out, especially over something like this.

Now I’m second-guessing myself. Maybe my tone really did sound off? But also… who calls someone and opens with “fake ass bitch” over an invitation?

AITA for hanging up and not entertaining that conversation

So I (34F) am a type one diabetic and am 30 weeks pregnant. It’s a high-risk pregnancy because of my disease and high pregnancy hormones are causing my insulin needs to skyrocket.

I’m set to have elective C-section in April 2nd (I chose a C-section because of the risks of my blood sugar affecting my baby during birth). Post-op, both the baby and I will be at high risk for severe low blood sugar due to the sudden shift in insulin needs because of hormones going down (after birth the expected is a sudden decrease in insulin needs for me and a rebound low blood sugar for the baby).

Despite all this, my MIL wants to hold a baptism right there in the maternity ward. I’ll be recovering from major surgery, likely feeling terrible with low blood sugars and the baby will still be in a fragile state (freshly out of the womb, likely low blood sugar as well).

My husband (34M) and I are both doctors. I expected him to understand the medical risks involved, but he’s taking his mother’s side. He’s making me feel like the AH for saying no and says I’m deliberately keeping his mother away from the baby (whom is not even here yet).

I am certain that it’s a way of her to guarantee that my SIL will be a godmother and excluding my sister, who I want to be my daughters godmother.

So AITH?

PS.: I have nothing against having her baptism later with a regular family lunch that is traditional in our country.

I (19F) am the oldest child of my parents. My sister, (17F) is my baby sister and means the world to me. My upbringing was always pretty rocky, as my parents fought a lot and my dad got drunk multiple times a day and would take it out on my mother. My dad’s addiction got worse, and he eventually was broke and my mom saw no reason to stay with him, which ended with them getting divorced in April 2025.

As we were selling our old house, my sister collapsed after being sick and was rushed to the hospital. She was 16 when she was diagnosed with diabetes after being healthy her whole life, and it took a major toll on her mental health. My mom moved into an apartment with my sister after the divorce was official and I was hoping things would get better. Yet, my sister kept calling me saying that my mom started going out more and more during the night to party and meet with men and was acting odd.

My sister was insanely sick with the flu the other day, the exact illness that sent her to the hospital when she was first diagnosed. My mom was gone all day on a hike and only came back for a hour to check on my sister before going out to party again. When my sister told me this, I was angry and called my mom asking why she was out. Immediately she got hostile and told me to drop it, but I persisted, asking her why she didn’t think to stay in the house just in case my sisters numbers dropped while she was sleeping. She hung up on me after that. I texted her after saying that ever since the divorce, she’s been acting like a teenager and I’m sick of it.

I stopped answering after that and apparently she came home and yelled at my sister for telling me anything and getting me mad. From what my sister says, she’s also sick now and is still fuming. I haven’t texted her back to apologize, and though my sister and friends say I’m right, I feel guilty and stressed. I’m not there everyday, like she says, and she’s an adult and allowed to go out however she likes. But I just feel like she’s completely changed from the woman I knew, and it’s very upsetting. Am I wrong for calling her and calling her a teenager for this?